Overwhelming

Writers: Devin, Bree
Date Posted: 2nd March 2007
Series: Saving Each Other

Characters: Talryne, N'vanik
Description: Things between Talryne and N'vanik aren't getting any less awkward, in spite of their best efforts.
Location: Dragonsfall Weyr
Date: month 2, day 28 of Turn 4

Talryne

N'vanik

Being on friendly terms with someone on the kitchen staff had more advantages than just sex. N'vanik had a full meal for two set out on the table, rather than just two filled plates like usual. No wine, though. Besides the concern of letting Tal have alcohol, it would make the meal seem like . . . too much. Since Talryne didn't go to the dining hall, she always ate in his weyr and now in hers. He wanted this to be a little change of pace.

}:Will you read to us after you eat?:{ Loseth asked. N'vanik smiled. "Sure." He'd read to Loseth since they were weyrlings, sometimes mentally and sometimes aloud. Loseth didn't understand some of the things in the stories, but he liked to hear them anyway. Now Loseth listened in when N'vanik read to Tal.

A soft knock on the door was quickly followed by Talryne's quiet voice at the door to the weyr. "Can I come in?"

"Yep." N'vanik went to open the door for her.

Talryne smiled shyly up at him and pressed a neatly tied cloth bundle into his hands. "I brought you something." She didn't wait for him to open it, slipping past him and deeper into the weyr to greet Loseth. If he didn't like the present, she didn't want to watch him try to pretend enthusiasm.

Unwrapping the bundle, he found a scarf almost the color of Loseth's hide. It was so . . . thoughtful. "You made this?"

"Mmmmmm." She leaned into Loseth's side and let her eyes drift shut as the comfortable feeling of his hide under her cheek soothed some of her nervousness. }:Show me,:{ Loseth said. N'vanik carried the scarf over and held it up for him to see. "It'll be useful around here." N'vanik stepped closer to Talryne and kissed her cheek. "Thank you."

}:It's very nice. N'vanik likes it,:{ Loseth told her as he rumbled softly.

"You're welcome." She gave Loseth's side a fond pat before straightening back up and turning to N'vanik. He was close enough that it was easy to reach out and take the scarf, so she twined it once around his neck and smoothed down the end hanging over his chest. "It's my first project since I came to the Weyr. I had to pull all the stitches out twice before I got it right."

"You did a good job." He toyed with the end of it for a moment before clearing his throat. "We should go eat."

"All right." The tension that had appeared between them seemed to be getting worse instead of better. It wasn't quite sexual tension--that she would have known how to fix. This was something else. Something she wasn't sure how to handle. "Thank you for getting such a nice dinner for us."

N'vanik went over to the table and hesitated before pulling a chair out for her. "I thought it would be a nice change." She slid into it, hating the awkward silence between them. **What do I do?** she asked Loseth tentatively. **How can I make it better?**

}:Talk about something, like what you did today. Or tell him a story. :{ The bronze suggested. }:He likes to be distracted when he feels like this.:{
**When he feels like _what_?** she asked a little desperately. Loseth searched for appropriate words. }:Confused and nervous.:{ His rider had been troubled with odd feelings lately, and there were some things he'd asked Loseth not to tell Talryne.

Talryne cleared her throat and wished there was something to drink on the table. Something that would dull the sharp edges on her nerves. "I left my weyr this afternoon. I went to see the weavers to find some more yarn."

"Really? How did it go? You weren't too nervous or anything?" A voice in the back of his head whispered that it was stupid to care about something so trivial, but he did. And it gave him something else to think about.

"It was terrifying," she admitted, smiling a little. "But I did it anyway. And nothing terrible happened, so I suppose I can do it again sometime."

He smiled. "Brave girl." He started loading meat onto his plate. "What's next on your list of things to conquer?"

"I don't know..." Her eyes studied his face and then slid away to the side. "Probably nothing we should talk about over dinner." She tried to make it a joke, but she wasn't sure how it came out. N'vanik's fork slipped, clattering against the plate. "What?"

Talryne winced. "Shards, I just made it worse, didn't I?"

"It's okay." He took a breath, trying to clear his head. "We should eat this, before it gets cold."

"I'm sorry," she offered hesitantly as she transferred some of the food to her plate. "Things have just been so awkward, N'vanik. I hate it."

Shards, why couldn't he control himself better? "I shouldn't have let it happen. I'm supposed to be looking out for you, not making you uncomfortable."

"That's not it. It's--" She sighed. "You're so patient, N'vanik. You're so sharding patient. And I can't seem to make a decision, and you just keep waiting..." She met his eyes and tried to look confident. "I can't make any promises, but maybe... we could try?" He wanted to say something comforting, or tell her she didn't need to rush or . . . "Now?"

She managed a shaky smile. "I'm not saying you should throw me down on the dinner table or anything... at least, maybe not the first time?" Her tone was a little more appropriate for a joke this time, but she couldn't quite hide how worried she was about his answer.

Throwing her down on the dinner table _had_ crossed his mind, but that was too extreme. "We can work our way up to that later." There was a hint of teasing in his tome. The look in his eyes stirred memories of when she'd felt desire and excitement, and that stirred something deeper. The craving that had always followed any pain or confusion--the need to feel wanted. She couldn't count the number of times she'd flung herself into the arms of complete strangers without so much as asking their names--but something kept her glued in her chair as she watched N'vanik. She licked her lips nervously and glanced down at the table. "Are we going to finish eating first?" He watched her and tried not to stare. Making her more nervous wasn't going to help. "If you want to." Food seemed very uninteresting at the moment. Talryne glanced back up and smiled as she shook her head. "I think the suspense would kill me."

"It's been killin' me for a while." N'vanik got up and walked around the small table. "Come on," he said quietly, taking her hand.

Her fingers tightened around his almost painfully as she stood. For a moment she looked nervous and lost and totally out of her depth. Then one hand slid up his chest, and a knowing smile curved her lips as her fingers tangled in his hair and pulled his lips down to hers. Awkward as things may have been, _this_ was something she knew how to do. His arms went around her waist, pulling her even closer. Kissing her was nothing new, but the feelings behind it this time were more intense. One hand slipped under her tunic to slide along the skin of her back.

Talryne wasn't prepared for her own reaction to the simple touch. She'd kissed N'vanik with desire but no emotion, and emotion but no desire. The feeling of both at the same time set her heart to racing so loudly she swore she could hear it even over her own desperate sounding moan. After months of feeling almost nothing, the sudden glut of sensation was overwhelming.

Her moan sent a shiver through his body and he made a low noise of his own. He could feel her heart against his chest, beating as fast as his own. After waiting for so long . . . N'vanik took a few steps back, leading them toward the sleeping room. She broke away from the kiss suddenly, struggling to catch her breath as she stared up at him with eyes gone slightly wide in panic. "That's--that's a little overwhelming," she managed. "I'm... that was quite a kiss."

"Yeah . . ." He tried to focus. "Too fast? We could slow down . . ."

"Maybe we should..." Shards, how _could_ they? All he'd done was kiss her! She'd slept with N'vanik before, and it had been nice. Pleasurable. Fun. This was something else entirely. This was...

**Shards, I'm in love with him, aren't I?**

}:Hmmm, I can't tell. I can't feel you the way I feel N'vanik,:{ Loseth said, making sure his rider didn't hear.

"Um, how much should we . . . slow down?" N'vanik asked. Certain parts of him were unhappy about this turn of events.

But Talryne's attention had shifted to Loseth. "Did he _hear_ that?" she demanded, eyes wild.

}:No.:{ "What?" N'vanik looked between Talryne and his dragon. Was Loseth talking to her? Were they talking about him? Talryne stumbled back a step, her cheeks flushed. "I--I thought something, and he heard it. And I just--I didn't know he would hear it." She took another step back and shook her head. "I'm sorry, N'vanik. I'm so sorry. I just--I need to go." "It's okay--you don't have to . . ." But she was already running out the door. Things should have finally been going right. How had they gone so wrong?

Last updated on the March 10th 2007

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Overwhelming