Echoes of Loss

Writers: Emma, Suzee
Date Posted: 4th August 2016

Characters: Jayzine, Jielta, Miyon
Description: A surprise letter
Location: River Bluff Weyr, Vintner Hall
Date: month 7, day 9 of Turn 8
Notes: Mentioned: Alrog, Fieayz

Jayzine

The young woman dipped her pen into the inkwell, staring at the hide
in front of her for some time before she finally began to write. It
hadn't been easy to come to this decision, but she knew she had to do
this to move on, if not for her sake, but for that of her younger
brother. Miyon was now old enough to realize that something wasn't
quite right any more, and doing this might help.

With a deep breath, she began to write.

"Mama, I'm so sorry this has taken me so long to do, but I had to work
things out in my own head, before I could even start to figure out how
to explain it to anyone else."

"The short version is, that despite everything, I miss Fieayz
terribly. I know we didn't always get on. I hated the way she found
life so easy, and how she could walk into a room and know instantly
who would be a friend, who to keep at arms length and who was worth
knowing. I hated the way that boys only had to look at her, and that
was it, they never looked at me. In the end I was so jealous that she
finally settled down. I never thought she'd find anyone as good as her
husband was. Life was just so easy for her."

"I hate that she was taken from us just as we'd finally begun to grow
up and maybe no become friends, but to at least know that we were
family, and that we'd be there for each other and Miyon no matter what
happened. Firehead is so cruel. They say she was virtually the last
one to get it, virtually the last one to die after she'd nursed her
husband, and his family through the worst. They say she just sat down
for a moment, complaining of tiredness and a headache, and that was
it, that was the firehead."

"It made me realize what it is to lose someone, to lose them for good,
to never know what they are thinking or feeling, whether they are
happy or sad. And that brings me to why I'm writing now. Because I
don't want to lose you too. I don't know that we can ever be as close
as we once were, but I'd just like to know you'd be there for me. Your
daughter, Jielta."

Putting the pen down, Jielta paused in her writing. Had she said too
much, or too little? Was it enough? Would her mother even reply?

At that point there was the welcome interruption of small feet as her
brother rushed into the room. "Look at this!" he said, waving a slate,
there were childish letter on it, the sort made by someone who had
just learned to write. "I can write, see."

"Yes, Miyon, you can." She smiled. Chances were though, he'd not
remember their sister properly, given he wasn't six turns yet.

"Want to write something on my letter? To Mama?" she asked.

He nodded, and she lifted him onto her lap, and handed him the pen.
"Take it slow and be careful."

Miyon's scrawl finally read, "I luv yu Mama, Miyon"

"Well done," she said with a smile. "Lets see if we can get this to
Mama, and see what she says."

~*~

It came in the midst of a small celebration for her promotion to
Headwoman. A few of her few friends had surprised her with some wine
and a small cake.

She couldn't help comparing the River Bluff vintage to that of the
Vintner Hall of her memories and it came off probably worse than it
should have in her own mind. Memories were always better than the real
thing right?

The courier handed her the note and she turned it over in her fingers
before she smiled at the the group, thanked them, and excused herself.

Her room was small, and hidden away in the back passages of the Weyr's
cliff. It wasn't like she spent a great deal of time here alone other
than for sleep and the rest of her days were filled with work. She'd
just pushed all those other concerns of her former life out of her
mind. It might have seemed callous to some but to her it was the only
way she could cope with her loss.

She paced a little back and forth before she reached for the note on
her desk. There were a very limited number of people who would care
enough to write her from the Vintner Hall. So, finally she took a deep
breath and picked it open. Smoothing the folds flat she began to read.

"Jeilta," she hadn't even heard from the girl in Turns. When she got
to the part about Fieayz she had to put it down and wipe her eyes
before she could continue. It was almost a Turn since her eldest had
passed and not a single person had thought to tell her, she'd found
out from a new drudge who'd accidentally blurted it out in the midst
of the kitchens that her brother Alrog and his wife had died of the
firehead.

She clutched her sides for a moment sobbing as the wave of grief
swamped her once again. Her eldest and brightest girl had found the
love she never had and then lost her life. It seemed so very cruel
after all they'd been through.

With a final scrub to her leaking eyes, she nodded and sat at her small table.

"My dearest Jielta," she began. "I would love to see you again if your
father will permit it. I miss your sister too. Please know that I will always
be here for you sweetheart." For a moment she didn't know what to say
about little Miyon. He was five turns now and didn't know her any more
than she knew him. But his little note broke the ice around her heart.
None of her own trials were his fault and her moment of weakness had left him
exposed and without a real parent. "Please tell Miyon I love him too and
let me know if you can come for a visit. I'll arrange for a dragonrider
to come pick you up. I've recently *today is recent right?* become the
Headwoman here at River Bluff and have nice new quarters where you
can all stay with me for as long as you want."

"Mother," she signed and tried to wipe a way a tear stain that left
the 'r' a little blurred.

"Okay," she stood and smoothed her apron. "I'm going to have to go
find some nice new quarters with two or three sleeping rooms. She
couldn't help the teary smile as she went to find a willing messenger
to take her reply to her living children.

Last updated on the August 13th 2016

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Echoes of Loss