Guilty Reflections

Writers: Heather
Date Posted: 26th May 2014

Characters: K'lvin
Description: Reflects about Bahji's leaving
Location: River Bluff Weyr
Date: month 6, day 24 of Turn 7
Notes: Mentioned: Bahji, E'rae, Eirlira

It had come in whispers at first, but the news had finally reached
K'lvin that Bahji was gone. The words had been like a blow to the gut,
and at first he hadn't been able to believe them. Not until he had
seen her empty weyr and the gloating Eirlira. He knew he had done
something unforgivable, but a part of him had hoped that she would see
reason. K'lvin's actions had never been in an attempt to hurt Bahji,
only to save her, but he knew that his justifications were weak.

It was his night to have Kylena in his weyr but he had feigned
sickness, and so his daughter remained with her foster mother. That
was for the best anyway, he would have been poor company for an
eight-Turn old in his current state. K'lvin wouldn't let his current
mood be a burden to his daughter.

Turning up the glass he held, K'lvin savored the taste of the hard
liquor. It burned all the way down, but the warming affects it had on
his stomach was exactly what K'lvin was after. Numbing.

He thought back to how easy his friendship with Bahji had been, and
then consequently, how easy and natural it had been to also be a lover
to her. Despite a large age difference, and her blindness, it had felt
completely natural to K'lvin. As if they had always been that way.

As he watched the light from the candle on his table flicker through
the liquor in his glass, he recalled the day he had found out that he
was being promoted to Wingleader. He had taken Bahji to the Dining
Cavern for a celebration meal, and had invited her to come to his weyr
any time. She had been hesitant to accept such an offer, afraid that
she might be hurt again the way she had been with E'rae.

**And what did I do? I promised her that I would never hurt her.** He
snorted. **Some fecking promise that was.** K'lvin finished off the
rest of his glass in one fluid gulp before setting the glass back to
the table.

How had such a young woman gotten under his skin in the first place?
Perhaps it was the desire to protect her, yes, it had probably started
out as that. But then he had discovered her sharp wit and sense of
humor too. K'lvin shook his head as he thought back to the moonlit
night when he had taken her to a tavern by the sea. She had been
ecstatic about eating fresh fish, and then they had swam together in
the moonlight before lying beneath the stars.

K'lvin swallowed a lump in his throat. Had he felt this remorseful
even when Cylena had left? He didn't think so. It had hurt when his
weyrmate had decided to leave, but at least then it had been her
decision. He had knowingly hurt Bahji, and now he had to live with
that guilt.

Last updated on the May 28th 2014

Welcome to Triad Weyrs!

Guilty Reflections