So Much for Imposter Syndrome

Writers: Devin, Halyonix
Date Posted: 17th February 2024

Characters: N'vanik, M'trel
Description: A quick chat about leadership during Wing practice
Location: Dolphin Cove Weyr
Date: month 12, day 19 of Turn 11

N'vanik

Hurricane Wing took a brief break for riders and dragons to get a
drink. After N'vanik emptied his cup he headed over to M'trel. "How's
your first day as 'Third so far?"

The fact that M'trel nearly choked on his drink, surprised by the
question since it knocked him out of thinking about his day so far,
should have told N'vanik what he needed to know.

"Fine!" M'trel sputtered, coughing. "Just fine." He thumped his chest.
After regaining his composure, he repeated, "Just fine. I'm...learning
a lot." Which was true. M'trel was very good at the theory of
leadership and what went into it but had very little practice with the
real-time application of it.

}: We are here because of our strengths, not because of our
weaknesses, :{ Noruith reminded him. Even though M'trel wasn't
watching the brown dragon, he could easily visualize how Noruith
flicked one wing slightly to emphasize his point. They were both
creatures of habitual mannerisms, body language that gave their
thoughts away.

"I'll get it though, I'm certain," M'trel assured N'vanik. "Is there
anything you see from your vantage that I need to work on
immediately?"

"Confidence," N'vanik said with a little smile. "You know the
formations, you know the Wing. You've led trios and nines for Turns."

Noruith gave a quiet grunt of agreement. Cornered, M'trel gave in.
"You're correct, sir, I just...it's definitely a different matter when
you apply the knowledge to the reality. Making decisions on the fly
will take practice. I just don't want to disappoint the Wing." Or the
Weyr at large. Being 'Third in the Weyrleader's Wing meant a little
bit more than other Wings.

But rather than inviting a pity party, M'trel turned his gaze back at
the Wing. "If you could tell yourself something then that you know
now, something you didn't know when you started as a leader, what
would it be?" he asked.

N'vanik gazed off into the distance thoughtfully. "Well, at the risk
of sounding sappy, 'you were meant for this'. When Loseth got me this
job I was woefully unprepared, but I stepped up because I had to.
Turns out I knew more than I thought I did."

}:I knew we would lead well,:{ Loseth said with calm assurance.

M'trel mulled it over. "So you're saying it's really just first-day
jitters and that in a few months, I'll wonder why I worried at all?"
he asked, with the crack of a smile beginning to form on his young
face.

"Well, the other option is we both realize we made a mistake and I
have to find another Wingthird." The Weyrleader arched an eyebrow.

M'trel gulped. "I uh...I don't think that..." He straightened and
composed himself. "No, Weyrleader sir, I don't think that's the option
to pursue." But he shot N'vanik a nervous smile to indicate that he
had gotten the jest.

}: Enough imposter syndrome, :{ Noruith said.

Well, that was that, then. "I've noticed that we seem to be having a
lag when it comes to the crossover maneuver on Threadfall thirteen. I
think we might be too heavy on the left side with that new brown,"
M'trel remarked.

"How do you think we should solve that?" N'vanik wanted to see his
problem-solving skills.

The brownrider's expression went pensive. "We should keep him there
but if we move one of the blues right, replace him with one of the
steadier greens, I think it'll even the Wing's balance during that
maneuver, and then we can have him fall back as planned for the second
crossover later."

"Then we should try that at drills tomorrow, don't you think?"

To that, M'trel nodded. "It'd do them no good to switch up drills this
late in the practice. Since we're working on Threadfall pattern two
today."

N'vanik didn't expect perfection immediately, but he needed someone
who could adjust quickly and do the work. "What else have you
noticed?"

But the brownrider shook his head. "Nothing solid yet, sir," he
answered. "There's...a Wing's got a lot of moving parts. Some of those
parts, it's rather easy to spot what's slowing it down. Other issues
take time to surface. And usually a lot of thinking to figure out."
His expression was determined though. "We'll figure it out, though.
Hurricane Wing is full of seasoned riders," he said, thinking of some
of the older riders in the Wing who would help out some of the younger
ones who showed great potential.

M'trel looked back out over the milling riders. "Shall we get back to
it, sir? And I can begin compiling notes for you to review after?"

The Weyrleader nodded. "Think about noticing strengths as well as
weaknesses," he said as he pulled on his riding helmet.

"Oh, good point, sir," M'trel said, nodding in agreement. "I'll keep
an eye on that too." Since it was his strengths that had gotten him
this position as well. M'trel looked at the Wing. "I'll get them
gath--"

Noruith warbled in a commanding tone that break was over.

M'trel shared a sheepish grin with N'vanik. "Guess that's the signal."

Last updated on the February 23rd 2024

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So Much for Imposter Syndrome