A Decision is Reached

Writers: Heather
Date Posted: 7th August 2019

Characters: Ranni, R'nar
Description: Ranni has to tell R'nar about her decision regarding the baby.
Location: Dolphin Cove Weyr
Date: month 11, day 26 of Turn 9
Notes: Mentioned: Xeladrie

Ranni

Ranni felt shaky and weak as she left the healers. Her insides felt numb, which was something that she had not expected. Before the healers had confirmed her pregnancy, she had thought the decision to abort a child would be easy. She had never wanted a baby, not really, so in her mind it had been a black and white decision.

She recalled the way her knees had shaken as she had walked with the dragonrider out to his waiting green dragon. The healers assured her that it would just take a little stay /between/ and then her body would do the rest.

Her thoughts were interrupted as she reached her destination. R'nar's door. She knew he was home, she had seen Iorath in the weyrcouch. Ranni took a deep breath and tried her best to settle her nerves before she knocked on the wooden portal.

To say R'nar was surprised when he opened his door to find Ranni standing in front of him was an understatement. His dark eyebrows jerked upward. "What are you doing here?" he asked.

Ranni had trouble meeting his eyes, but forced her chin up to do so. "Can I come in for a second? I need to talk with you about something."

A look of suspicion filled the bronzerider's dark brown eyes, but he opened the door a little wider and stepped to the side so she could enter. Was she going to apologize for the things she had said to him after the Hatching? he wondered. Maybe she had just been overwhelmed with how quickly her life had changed that night and perhaps what she had said to him hadn't been completely true?

R'nar tried to squash the flutter of hope he felt. How pathetic was that? Here he was, a bronzerider, son of the Weyrwoman, hoping this waif of a Weyrling would tell him that she hadn't meant it and that she really did have feelings for him, as he did for her.

He watched her as she walked stiffly into his weyr and took a seat in the chair she had always curled up in when she'd spent time with him as a Candidate. R'nar knew when she finally made up her mind to tell him what she had to say because she exhaled roughly and looked up at him with those obsidian eyes.

"I went to the healers yesterday," she said. "I woke up sick and Panne thought that I was pregnant. The healers confirmed that she was right."

Whatever R'nar had been expecting Ranni to say, it was not that. The bronzerider slid slowly down into a chair, still staring at the Weyrling, stunned. "You swore you were on the teas."

Ranni's chin lifted again in that stubborn way he had thought was cute once upon a time. "I lied. I was afraid that I wouldn't Impress and a baby was a way to... to...."

"To make sure I would take care of you?" R'nar finished for her in disbelief. The irony was that he had wanted to do that, take care of her, a baby had not been necessary to accomplish it.

"Yes." Ranni confirmed, her voice softer. Licking her lips, she pressed on. "We were told in Candidate classes how difficult it would be for a Weyrling to have a baby. Not an impossible thing, but not a smart thing either because it would push the Weyrling's training back and she would graduate behind the rest of her clutchmates."

A sinking feeling was entering R'nar's stomach as he began to guess the direction that this conversation was going to take.

"The healers told me that aborting the baby would be quick and easy. A short trip /between/ and," she snapped her fingers. Ranni wiped her palms on her knees. "So I went today, to the healers, they set up a dragonrider to take me /between/."

R'nar's gut twisted. He should have at least been the one to do that, he thought.

Ranni's eyes filled with tears, one of the only times R'nar ever remembered seeing her cry. "But when we got to the dragon, I couldn't do it." She could not explain to him her complete decision, because a part of it had to do with Lady Xeladrie.

His eyebrows lifted. "You... You are still pregnant?"

"Yes." She brushed away her tears quickly from her cheeks. "I just wanted you to know. You don't have to help out, or anything," she shook her head, she did not expect that, or necessarily want that. "But now, after the baby is born, if you want to visit him or her, you will have that option."

R'nar was reeling. He was going to be a father? He barely felt like an adult sometimes. As the shock from her news began to fade, it was replaced with anger. When she had said that she had used him to secure her place in the Weyr, she had really been telling the truth, he just had not realized the extent of it. What kind of person was she?

Ranni could see as R'nar's facial features changed from shocked to stiffened, which had been the reaction she had been bracing for. "Well, now you know. If you don't want anything to do with the baby, that is fine too. If you don't want anyone to know that you fathered a child, I certainly won't say anything." She stood.

The bronzerider leaped to his feet, as it was clear that she was preparing to leave. R'nar didn't know what he wanted, everything was being dumped on him so quickly.

"You are going to drop this on me and leave?" he demanded.

She paused and looked over her shoulder at him. "Yes, I'm a Weyrling, remember? I have chores to do, while I am still able to do them, and a dragonet to care for."

R'nar swallowed a smartass retort that was on the tip of his tongue. "I will let you know what I decide," he settled for saying.

Ranni nodded and made to leave, only to stop at the door and say, "For what it is worth, I am sorry." Stealing a glance up at him, she waved her hand and left, traveling much faster away from his weyr than she had traveled toward it.

Last updated on the August 19th 2019

Welcome to Triad Weyrs!

A Decision is Reached