The Truth Hurts

Writers: Heather
Date Posted: 23rd July 2019

Characters: Ranni, R'nar
Description: Ranni finally comes clean with R'nar about her intentions.
Location: Dolphin Cove Weyr
Date: month 11, day 20 of Turn 9
Notes: Mentioned: Cyradis (not by name)
Takes place after DCW: Filling the Void

Ranni

Sukiith. A light smile curved Ranni's lips as she traced her index finger down the center of her lifemate's eyeridges. The chunky green dragonet did not budge but remained sound asleep.

The other Weyrlings had dropped their new lifemates off to sleep and then changed clothes to return to the Dining Cavern for the Hatching Feast. Ranni had no family and no reason to go, not when the most important thing in her entire world was asleep in the barracks.

In truth, a part of Ranni was afraid to leave Sukiith. What if she walked away from her and then woke up from this incredible dream? Then she would be back to square one, a nobody. A drudge who tricked her way into the Weyr.

The sound of footsteps caught her attention.

"Hey, there you are." R'nar's husky tenor broke the quiet. The young bronzerider was dressed in his Gather best, in black from head to toe, accentuating his dark hair and bronzed skin. "I kept waiting to see you at the feast."

Ranni averted her gaze. She should feel lucky that someone as attractive and wellbred as R'nar liked her, but sometimes his presence was suffocating. "I didn't have any family that would be at the feast. I would rather be here with Sukiith."

"Well, you had me," he pointed out, coming over and taking a seat beside of her on the floor by Sukiith.

"There are other girls there for you to dance with and talk to," she replied.

R'nar's brow furrowed, confusion showing in his eyes. "Well, there is only one girl I wanted to dance with and talk to... And she's sitting here still in her Candidate's robe."

When she looked up the expression on his face made her heart quicken with guilt. He had never shown her anything but kindness, which was exactly the opposite of what she had experienced from men at Sunstone. She had used him, and his feelings for her, as protection from being turned out of Dolphin Cove if she didn't Impress. Now that Sukiith was in her life, she no longer needed R'nar's protective arm.

"R'nar," she began, but broke off, unsure of how to say what she needed to when he was sitting there with his heart in his eyes. "Now that I have Impressed Sukiith... there's really no need... I mean..." Her brain scrambled for something to say. "With Weyrling rules we won't be able to continue our relationship." There! That was it! There was no need to tell him the real reason she had gone along with their relationship.

**Coward,** a voice inside her hissed.

"I know," R'nar said, a slow smile spreading across his face, his dimples lean slashes in his cheeks. "I have been through it, remember? It goes by faster than you think." He reached out and tucked a strand of her silky black hair behind her ear in a tender gesture. "I'll wait."

Monogamy, being exclusive, was something that R'nar had never dreamed of before Ranni. He'd been raised in the Weyr. He didn't want to be exclusive with Ranni out of jealousy, but because he had lost the desire for intimacy with other women. They all paled in comparison to the drudge-turned-dragonrider that sat beside him.

**Drat, drat, double drat!** Ranni pressed her fingers to her temples. He wasn't getting the picture. She wanted out! As a drudge at the Hold she had been in servitude to a life that she hadn't wanted and now, with Sukiith, she had her freedom and she didn't want to be tied to a man.

"No, R'nar," this time when she spoke there was a strength and confidence that had been lacking in her voice. "There is no need for you to wait."

"What? Why?" His eyes searched her face.

"Look... The time we spent together, it was nice -"

**Nice?** He winced.

"But after Sukiith and I graduate, I am not interested in picking up where you and I left off. I just want to be my own person and make my own decisions."

R'nar felt stunned. Where was this coming from? "And a relationship with me is not a choice you would make again?"

"It wasn't really a choice the first time," she blurted.

The bronzerider visibly reeled back. "What do you mean?"

"Look, I was afraid I wouldn't be able to stay at the Weyr if I didn't Impress. I didn't exactly come here on good terms, you know? But you were the Weyrwoman's son, and a bronzerider so - "

"So if you slept with me, you thought you would be able to stay?" R'nar finished for her, voice taut with hurt and anger as he pushed quickly to his feet. "You mean," he paced, hands in his hair, "this whole time has been... You've been..."

"Using you." Ranni finished for him.

R'nar felt as if he had been cut to the quick, and even more than that, he felt embarrassed. How stupid he must have sounded when he had offered to wait for her! All those times they had been together and she had just been pacifying him, just telling him what he wanted to hear.... **All because my mother's the Weyrwoman.** He felt sick.

"I can't believe it. When you lied and tricked A'vel I knew you had done wrong, but I felt sorry for you because of your circumstances. Then when you freaked out during Panitath's flight, I took the blame because I knew you were inexperienced. I was so stupid and blinded to you... You really are a lying, manipulative-"

**Faranth,** he bit off the insults and closed his eyes. "Well, you got your wish, Ranni. I'll leave you alone." R'nar rasped as he turned away.

Ranni pressed a hand to her aching abdomen as he stalked off. Before he had gone ten paces he turned and added, "Oh, and congratulations on Impressing. Mission accomplished."

She deserved the parting shot, she knew.

}:Mine?:{ Sukiith asked questioningly, her tone thick with sleep.

Exhaling slowly to calm her racing heart, Ranni stroked Sukiith's muzzle. "Go back to sleep, dear heart. It's nothing."

Last updated on the July 23rd 2019

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The Truth Hurts