In the Moment

Writers: Eimi, Paula
Date Posted: 6th December 2017

Characters: Corowal, Erassa
Description: Corowal and Erassa continue their drunken night
Location: Emerald Falls Hold
Date: month 2, day 4 of Turn 9

The surface of liquid in brandy bottle was lowering fast. Corowal had
found a second glass, probably left behind by one of the kids. He
didn't care what it had been used for, the alcohol killed germs
anyway.

Erassa took her much slower. She had inherited her father's ability
to hold her liquor, but she didn't like the feeling of being drunk.
Besides, she didn't like the look of her father when he had come home
slobbering drunk. The last time she had seen him, he had come in and
insulted both her and her son, disowning them and casting them out
like garbage. That had been his birthingday. She hadn't seen him
since. Corowal had comforted her that day she remembered. Shards,
why did she have to think of that now?

"So, what did Beleran do with the mark he won from Turn Over
competition?" Corowal asked. "That was one fine sling shot he did."
The boy had taken a part to some kid's games and won sling-shot
competion for under 10 Turns old.

"You gave him some good pointers," she said, running a finger along
the rim of the glass. Despite the cold shoulder he had shown to her,
he had always treated her son kindly. He was the only father the boy
had ever known, and she was grateful for that. "He bought a book and
a nice savings pot and we put the rest in there."

"Books are good, so is saving for the rainy day. He's a smart kid,"
Corowal replied.

"He is," she agreed softly, a smile touching her lips as she thought
about her little man. "He's been fortunate." Not many bastards were
welcomed into the Lord Holder's family.

"He's Wallia's milkbrother," Corowal said simply. To him, that was as
good as real brother.

"He's the bastard son of a dragonrider and a shamed woman who has been
cast out by her own family. Had I not been nursing him when Wallia
needed a wet nurse, his future would have looked very dim indeed."
She probably would have had no other choice but to return with him to
the Weyr, to B'lion. It would have broken her, but she would have
done it for him. "But I am not wet nurse to your children any
longer." Erassa looked at him as she broached the subject that had
been haunting her for a while now. Was she still even needed now?

"You're their fostermother. Shards, those kids have lost two mothers
now, you're the stability they need. Besides the younger ones won't
even remember their mothers, you're the one they remember always being
there for them," Corowal said. He was suddenly hit with one of those
drunken depressions and stared to his glass, saying mournfully. "I'm
lousy husband who's killed two wives now, both with childbirth. Only
reason it worked with Dinalee, cause she never had to actually live
with me."

"You did not kill your wives," Erassa was quick to protest firmly.
"Their deaths were tragic, but they were not your doing." But she had
to admit, living with Corowal was not the easiest.

"I got them pregnant," Corowal replied. He leaned drunkedly towards
her and continued: "You know what was funny? Well, not funny-funny,
more like sad-funny. I started to get marriage proposals even before
Felyna was properly buried. I have this fifteen turns old daughter,
really pretty and well behaving. I have daughter, she's eighteen and
harper and oh, she's also your cousin but hey, that shouldn't
bother anybody!"

"And people say _I_ should be ashamed," Erassa said with disgust. The
way these Holders traded their daughters away for a chance at more.
As if they didn't already have enough!

"People are such a bloody hypocrites," Corowal agreed. "Anyways, I
think I've done marrying."

One of the fostermother's eyebrows lifted skeptically. The brandy was
making her bold. "Forgive me if I don't believe you, Corowal."

"What? I didn't say I'll swear off women, just marrying them. There'sh
a difference," Corowal said.

"Oh, I _know_ you weren't saying that." Like he would ever be able to
keep it in his pants. "But the first good deal that comes along, I
will bet good marks you'd be tempted. And if she's a pretty young
thing, I doubt you could resist not having her."

"Well.." Corowal really didn't have anything to say to that, she was
probably right. So he just poured them more drink.

She took a healthy sip before sitting back into the chair she sat in.
"And what will happen to Beleran and I if your next wife decides that
we should not be part of your family at all?"

"I wouldn't let that happen," Corowal shook his head.

"You almost let it happen this time," she pointed out. "Don't you
remember Beleran and I used to live in that little adjacent apartment
right there," she said pointing to the door that lead to their private
quarters. "But Lady Felyena decided I was too close and you let her
send us away."

"Yeah, well, sorry about that," Corowal had indeed forgotten.

Erassa snorted softly, staring down into the cup in her hands. "Do
you have any idea how many times I lay awake at night and can't sleep
because in the back of my mind is always that thought, 'Tomorrow could
be the day he decides to throw you out completely'. Especially after
that Turns End kiss."

"Doing that in the public might have been a bit of a mistake," Corowal
said with wince.

"Yeah, a bit." After all, it was no benefit to anyone. It
embarrassed his wife, shamed Erassa, and shocked the Holders. True,
she had offered him the chance to make her his mistress, but only if
he had acknowledged her publicly in front of the Hold. It wasn't his
touch she had sought, but his protection. But after that moment, her
position had never been so precarious. "Why did you kiss me if you
had no intention of making me your official mistress. Nothing good
came of it for any of us."

"I can't remember what I thought, I'm sure if felt like a good idea
back then," Corowal admitted. A Turns had passed since that moment.

"Every bad decision seems like a good idea in the moment, doesn't it,"
she said, thinking about some of her own poor choices. The question
now was, was it even possible for them to recover from the bad choices
they had made?

Last updated on the December 10th 2017

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