A Moment of Nerves

Writers: Avery
Date Posted: 28th March 2016

Characters: K'ran
Description: K'ran deals with nerves on the night before Threadfall.
Location: River Bluff Weyr
Date: month 5, day 3 of Turn 8
Notes: Mentioned: F'lin, Orlaith

K'ran

Threadfall was tomorrow, the first one he would lead as the Weyrleader of River Bluff Weyr. K'ran should have been falling asleep, but instead he was lying in bed with his hand over his eyes, trying to take long deep breaths to calm his nerves.

As he'd discovered from flying with multiple Weyrs since Impressing, for every difference there was a similarity. There were patterns in how Thread fell, and it depended on the weather and on the terrain one was flying over. Some had been effortless to pick up. Those were the patterns were designed for the cool air over the mountains and the strong currents
there. Those were like the ones of Dragonsfall, especially since they shared Falls over parts of the Western Barrier Ranges. He'd felt comfortable with those. Except that the riders were different and still unknown quantities it had been like leading Cyan.

On the other hand, because it was a Weyr by the ocean, some of the patterns were like those he'd flown at Ista and Dolphin Cove. Those were more suited towards the way that sea air felt to fly in, heavy and switching between warm and cool air blowing in and out depending on the seasons, the ones flown over holds like Jade Harbor and Sunstone. It had been some time since he'd flown those with any regularity, but he was adapting back to it.

He had been drilling with Rapids for days. First he'd watched F'lin lead them after realizing jumping right in wasn't as good an idea as his confidence had thought, then participating in those in the Wingsecond role for the next two days. And then he'd been leading Rapids in drills for the last few days. He felt like he'd begun to grasp how Rapids worked as a unit, and hoped they'd been getting used to his style. Minor incidents
happened when a wing's composition or leadership changed. It was normal.

**But the Weyrleader is held to a higher standard, and his wing to the highest. So everyone judges your mistakes harder than they would someone else's. And because you're _foreign_, it's even worse.** The traitorous seeds of doubt appeared in his mind, just like they had been throughout the day.

K'ran breathed out, trying to dispel the doubts. He had done well with Rapids today - there had been no problem. There hadn't been any major disasters during drills, and if there had been minor concerns when a changeover didn't go correctly or something was called wrong, well, he preferred gentle correction to yelling at anyone. And yes, there had been those rumors he'd overheard on the first day from Rapids riders. But since then he hadn't managed to overhear any. Either the gossip mill was quieting down, or people had heard about his dressing down of the brownrider had been more careful about where they said it.

He knew what they'd be saying, too. Foreign bronze. Rank-grabber. Queen-stealer. They'd judge Rogueth's size. They'd judge his own height. They'd take those minor mistakes and blow them out of proportion and judge him not fit to lead. If Rapids had doubts, wouldn't the whole Weyr? All the Wings?

}:People talk. Dragons fly. Our wing has flown with me, they will follow. The other wings will follow them,:{ Rogueth sent over, with a total lack of concern in the bronze's mind voice. }:If Orlaith did not think I could lead, she would not have chosen me. You will see:{

The bronze accompanied his words with a warm wash of love and affection, as well as a boost of his own confidence. Hadn't he spent time with Orlaith on the ledge after drills? Wasn't she pleased? Who would the other dragons and riders be to challenge the right of the Queen's choice?

With confidence like that boosting him, K'ran was able to push the doubts back, at least enough for sleep to enfold him.

Last updated on the April 4th 2016

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A Moment of Nerves