An Attempt At Comfort

Writers: Avery, Yvonne
Date Posted: 22nd October 2015

Characters: Alina, Ikalis
Description: Ikalis checks in on Alina, but it doesn't go like she wanted.
Location: Dolphin Cove Weyr
Date: month 1, day 25 of Turn 8
Notes: Mentioned: D'hol

Alina

Alina wasn't sure how she got back to her little weyr. The time
between leaving the flight cots and closing the door behind herself
was a blur. She was scrubbed clean enough that her skin hurt, and her
hair was braided back so tightly that it pulled at her scalp. For a
while she stood with her forehead against the wood of the door, trying
to process what had happened.

Imarith had risen, and she-- her mind shyed away from the thought. Let
that memory be lost. Let her life go on as if it had never happened.
She traced the whorl of the wood grain with her fingertips, trying to
think of nothing at all. If she thought, she'd panic. And Imarith
might wake up. And then all of the iron will on Pern wouldn't be
enough to save her dragon from her rider. And Imarith deserved better
than that.

After a little while she retreated to her bed, curled up, and shut her
eyes. Imarith was still asleep so she had no excuse to go back to
drills or the staring eyes of her classmates. They'd all _know_. What
she'd done, how she'd acted, all of it. The thought made her sick to
her stomach.

Breathe.

The silence settled around her like wool, soothing the raw edges of
her psyche. Her body hurt and there was a burning between her legs,
but even that subsided after a while.

There was a knock at the door.

**Go away,** Alina thought irritably. She curled up a little tighter
on her bed and tried to will them gone.

Ikalis knocked on the door again. She really wanted to see Alina and
make sure she was... okay. What if she was on the edge of despair?
Imarith had risen, and now... her own stomach roiled between her own
jealousy and frustration that someone else had been with Alina,
someone Alina hadn't wanted that way, and her real fear that something
was going to go wrong and the greenrider would be broken by this.

Wavecrest sensed his owner's feelings. He blinked /between/ into the
weyr space, chirping at Alina when he saw her.

**Wavescrest.** That meant Ikalis. And if Wavecrest was here, then
Ikalis knew she was inside and was likely to knock until she was let
in, even if it took candlemarks. Alina sighed and sat on the bed,
wincing slightly. "Just a moment." She ran her hands over her hair,
wiped her eyes, and went to open the door. "Hi. Sorry. I'd just about
fallen asleep."

Ikalis was holding a small covered tray in her hands. She looked down
at the floor as the words rushed out of her. "I didn't mean to keep
you awake. I brought some food, if you wanted it. Stuff that'll keep
if you want to sleep. I just didn't want you to forget to eat."

Alina managed a small smile. "Thank you. That was very thoughtful of
you. I'd probably have just fallen asleep forever and woken up
ravenous sometime next sevenday."

"That'd be pretty terrible," Ikalis agreed. She came in and set the
tray on a table, still looking at it. What was she supposed to say or
do? Alina was standing and talking - she wasn't collapsed on the floor
crying or screaming, although that might have happened before she
arrived.

"I don't know. It seems like a pretty good idea right now." The
greenrider looked at the tray of food disinterestedly, even though
Ikalis had assembled some of her favourites; a fresh apple, a bit of
soft cheese, and the seed studded crackers she loved.

"You could probably be off sick tomorrow if you wanted," Ikalis said
softly. Other greenriders did it sometimes. "Sleep in, enjoy a
restday..."

"What would be the point of that?" Everyone already knew, and the only
person who thought that Imarith's rising was a big deal was her.
Therefore, it wasn't a big deal at all. She'd just have to move on. Her
gaze drifted from Ikalis to the texture of the plaster on her wall.
"D'hol was _there_."

Chasing, she meant. Had he won? Had her own Wingleader been the one
who'd...hurt her badly. It didn't have to be hurt, Ikalis knew, but for
Alina it had been. She could sense it, remembered seeing one girl
student at the Baker's Hall who'd been hurt by an apprentice, had
carried an odd fragility around. It had reinforced her belief that men
were porcines.

"Sometimes people really are hurt after. And sick. It wouldn't be a
shame to have to go to the Healers if you need." Ikalis tried to keep
her voice soft and gentle.

"I don't need to go to the Healers!" Alina shot back. "People's dragons
rise all the time!"

"And people get hurt when it happens. Are you fine?" Ikalis looked
towards Alina, but not right into her eyes, wondering if the greenrider
would answer.

"I said I'm _fine_, Ikalis!" Alina crossed her arms and glared at her
friend. Ikalis' concern seemed more like an attack, like she'd done
something wrong again. Like she was a Holdbred, idiotic girl who
couldn't manage to take care of herself or know her own mind. Anger
felt good after the numbness she'd felt after the flight.

"Hey, hey, okay." Her face flushed a little. Had she overstepped her
bounds? She probably had.

Alina closed her eyes and huffed a sigh. Twice now in one day she was
having to reassure others, when she was the one who had gone through
something horrible. It wasn't _fair_. "Look. I'm just-- I'm fine. I'm
just tired. Thanks for bringing me dinner, but I think I'm just going to
go to sleep."

"I'm sorry if I troubled you," the caverns worker said, daring to settle
her hand very gently on Alina's shoulder. "Sure, sleep is good. The food
should stay good overnight if you want it for breakfast."

Alina moved out of reach, Ikalis' hand feeling more like a lead
weight. All she wanted was for the other girl to leave her alone.
"Thanks."

"Well, see you around then." Ikalis headed for the door, unsure of
what else to do. Clearly her attempt at comforting hadn't gone over
right. Hopefully Alina would be feeling better in a few days.

The greenrider didn't call a goodbye. She watched Ikalis go, then
crawled back to the safety of her bed and drew the sheets over her
head. She felt raw, inside and out, but hopefully the silence would
soothe the raw edges enough so that she'd have the strength to face
tomorrow.

Last updated on the October 26th 2015

Welcome to Triad Weyrs!

An Attempt At Comfort