A Time to Grow Up...

Writers: Ames, Anaria
Date Posted: 9th April 2011

Characters: Mardria, Janatan
Description: Mardria visits a mindhealer
Location: River Bluff Weyr
Date: month 1, day 20 of Turn 6

**I don't even know why I'm doing this,** Mardria thought as she sat
on Soravath, unwilling to dismount. **I can fix my problems on my
own.**

}:Then why haven't you?:{ The green sagely replied.

**It's hard when you're 84...** Mardria started.

}:There are older people at the Weyr. Some of them are still mostly
active. You just prefer gossiping with the Aunties to actually trying
to better yourself,:{ Soravath responded, her tone sharp.

"Fine," Mardria said aloud as she dismounted. She found the
Mindhealer's office easily, and took a deep breath before knocking
lightly on the door.

Janatan sat behind his desk when the knock sounded.

"Enter," he called out, looking up to see who would enter.

Mardria opened the door, entering quickly before she lost her nerve.
"Journeyman Janatan? I'm greenrider Mardria.The Infirmary advised me
to come speak to you. I... uh... Well, they think that I have issues
dealing with some things that happened to me in my past, and that
talking to a Mindhealer about it might help."

He pushed aside the records he'd been reviewing, all eyes on her.

"Do come in. Have a seat," he indicated a chair and rose from his own
desk to move over to take one near to it. "If you've already been
advised to come here, I take it you've spoken to someone about your
troubles. Why not tell me what you told them, eh?" He tried to put his
visitors at ease whenever possible and often talking about whatever
was on their mind first told him much more than they realized.

"Well then, where to start," Mardria said, as she took the seat she'd
been offered. "Well, I was an apprentice dragonhealer until I
Impressed Soravath when I was 21. Before the plague I'd had two sons
with my weyrmate, K'dras. My sons and I survived, but my parents,
weyrmate and most of my siblings died. I distracted myself by getting
involved with the Weyrlingstaff. I weyrmated again to a man named
S'brian, and we were happy until Thread came back. I lost both of my
sons and S'brian within a very short period of time," Mardria
explained, quickly wrapping 60 turns up into a few sentences. "Since
then, I guess I've just been in denial."

It was clear to Janatan that she had no trouble opening up about her
problems, unlike so many of the others he worked with. She'd spouted
off her history as though she were ticking off marks on a hide.

"So, Mardria, what is it that you are in denial about? You seem to
know what it is that is bothering you, so why then did the healers
feel you needed someone to speak to now?"

"I suppose I distance myself from my problems. I pretend that they
aren't real and they don't bother me. I know that bad things happened,
I just almost feel like they happened to someone else. It's like a
list of facts, not a list of occurrences to me, if that makes sense at
all. I don't act like an 84 year old woman, I act like a spoiled
weyrbrat," Mardria said.

"I see," he replied, taking in her form and noting that she obviously
spoiled herself as well. "I don't think there's anything wrong with
not acting like an 84 year old woman, and if distancing yourself from
your problems helps you to move on and return to your normal
activities, then I see nothing wrong with that either. It is when the
problems and the past are affecting your present that we need to worry
about. Are they affecting you at present? Do you still get out and
about like you would like to on a daily basis? And..." he gestured to
her, "Is this what you want for yourself?"

"Well, no," she said, flushing a bit. While she was in denial about
just how much she'd let herself go, she had been noticing the
increasing need to procure larger and larger clothing from the
Headwoman. "I don't want to be the old woman that all the weyrbrats
laugh at. I still want to be the pretty young lady that all the
bronzeriders want to flirt with, you know? And uh... I guess I don't
really have much in the way of daily activities. I gossip with the
aunties, occasionally talk to the weyrlings or candidates... that's
it. If I were to die tomorrow, I think only my feline would notice!"
She lamented.

Janatan listened intently, wanting to make her feel comfortable
sharing with him. "I think I see our problem Mardria. You need
something to occupy your time. 84 Turns and you look as young as 60!
Yet, just because you're no longer doing all the activities you did in
your youth does not mean that you should not still be active. Tell me,
did you ever study a craft or have an interest in one?" He was hoping
that if she had a reason to be active, her outlook on things would
improve.

Mardria nodded, "I used to be a dragonhealer until I Impressed. Then I
got busy trying to attract bronzeriders, and raising my children. I
guess I just stopped having the time that I did before Soravath chose
me. And once I was done with those things I worked with the
Weyrlingstaff, and it never occurred to me to try and join a craft
again."

He nodded, "Well, why don't you speak with the dragonhealers then,
first thing in the morn. See if there is something you can do to get
back involved in your craft." Janatan paused, "Now, while I'm not one
to speak of other health matters, I would think that it would be good
for you to get out for a nice walk or swim each day. Maybe find a
friend or make a new one who could join you each morning. Working with
others really can bring out the best in ourselves."

Mardria smiled as the mindhealer spoke, an idea already forming in her
mind. "You know, that's a great suggestion. I don't know why I didn't
come up with it sooner! There's a new boy here at the Weyr, his name
is Angshel. He seems to be going through a rough time, and he could
really use a mother figure at the Weyr. Although, it's not quite the
same of a nice man in my bed..." she added with a wink.

Janatan actually shifted a bit uncomfortably at her words, feeling
slightly warm at the thought of the much older woman clearly flirting
with him. "Well, that sounds like a good plan. The helping of the boy,
I mean," he added quickly, lest she think he wanted something more.
"Why don't you come see me again in a sevenday and we can see if
things are improving for you?"

Mardria nodded. "That sounds like a lovely idea. It was wonderful
talking to you!" She said. **If they would have told me mindhealers
just let me prattle on about myself, I would have come here turns
ago!** She thought, and Soravath's mental groan was all the response
she needed. "Thank you so very much for your time!"

Last updated on the April 28th 2011

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A Time to Grow Up...