Lies Run Both Ways

Writers: Suzee, Devin
Date Posted: 12th February 2011

Characters: Tavia, L'rak
Description: Tavia meets up with her former weyrmate
Location: Dolphin Cove Weyr
Date: month 13, day 23 of Turn 5
Notes: Follows: To the Dolphins

Tavia

She walked into the dining hall hoping that the noise and commotion
could help her still the voices whirling in her head. Ok, well mostly
her own voice whirling in her head. The reality of the whole thing was
still a little overwhelming so she moved through the line not even
seeing what she put on her tray.

Normally she scanned the room for an open spot but she just set her
tray on a nearby table and didn't even look to see who was sitting
next to her.

L'rak considered getting up and leaving, but he thought he should at
least attempt to be civil. "Hi Tavia."

She closed her eyes and forced a smile before she turned her head
"L'rak" she said to acknowledge his greeting. She poked at her food
unhappily for a long empty moment then added. "How are you?"

"I'm ... well. And you?" The words want to stick in his throat.

Before she could even think it popped out "Pregnant." She turned her
head slowly away as her eyes opened wide. If she could have stuffed
the word back in her mouth she would have.

"What?" He went cold.

Once she'd felt so close to him and now... she'd lost more than just a
weyrmate when he'd walked out of her life. She'd lost a good friend,
though she couldn't lay all the blame for that at his door as much as
she might like.

"Sorry, wasn't planning on telling anyone yet." **For certain not
before the father.**

Even after two turns, it still hurt. "Are you going to dump this one
like you dumped mine?"

**Good ol L'rak, right to the knife.** She wanted to just pick up her
tray and walk away. Why did he still have the power to hurt her like
that. "No, I'm keeping this one." Mentally she blinked. **I guess I
made up my mind.** she thought.

He felt like stabbing his fork through the table. It took an effort
not to try it. "I guess that means you care about this guy more than
you cared about me."

"If you're talking about right now, this point in time? I like him a
whole lot better than I like you." she fairly spat the words at him.
"I loved you L'rak and what did it get me? An empty weyr and a broken
heart. So as far as I am concerned you were a sharding idiot if you
thought I would keep something that would tie me to you forever!"

"No, you had to do the lowest, _cruelest_ thing you could to do me, to
punish me!" His hand clenched around his fork, his knuckles turning
white.

"Oh really?" she said. "You didn't want me you wanted her. You made
your choice. You don't get your bubbly and eat it too. Thats not the
way life works, or maybe it does in your twisted little brain."

"I wanted _both_ of you. I didn't want to hurt anybody." It suddenly
felt like it had all happened yesterday, his heart being torn in so
many ways.

"But you _did_ L'rak, if you'd mentioned that up front I'm sure things
would have turned out differently." She shook her head. "I love you
but let me go bang someone else while you make my dinner, wasn't the
deal I signed up for." She didn't have the ability to even admit to
herself exactly how that time had changed her. The only being she
fully trusted not to hurt her was Sawauth. She kept everyone else at
arms length.

"I screwed up, I know. But you didn't have to get rid of our baby, and
you definitely didn't have to shove it in my face." That was the worst
of it. If she'd taken the trip /between/ quietly and never told him,
that would have been one thing. But Tavia had made sure that he knew
about it. Made sure she hurt him.

"We've been through all of this before and never resolved any of it
then nor will we now." She stood and picked up her tray. "For what
it's worth, I hope you and Aradal are very happy." Tavia turned to
walk away but stopped and turned back. She had to let go of the whole
thing the hurt and the lies, everything if she was going to move on.
He was like a bad taste in her mouth and two turns was enough.

"There's no need to daydream about the might have beens over that baby
any more." She leaned in closer and lowered her voice "It wasn't
yours." She walked away.

L'rak stared at her as she left. What he felt was ... relief. A little
broken piece of his heart mended and he let out a long sigh. All this
time, she'd been lying to him. He should be angry at her for it, but
his relief was too great. Everything else they'd said and done to each
other had been bad enough, and all through the messy end of their
relationship he'd hoped there was a way to hold on to their
friendship. But after she ended her pregnancy, he knew it was over,
and he knew he could never forgive her. Now that deep hurt was gone.

And he was just the jerk that had dumped her for another woman.

Last updated on the May 27th 2011

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Lies Run Both Ways