The Crucible of Life
Dragonsfall Weyr
Amber Hills Hold
Vintner Hall
Healer Hall
Hidden Meadows
Dolphin Cove Weyr
Dolphin Hall
Emerald Falls Hold
Harper Hall
Printer Hall
Green Valley Hold
Leeward Lagoon Hold
Barrier Lake Weyr
Sunstone Seahold
Citrus Bay Hold
Writers: Clancey
Date Posted: 30th October 2009
Characters: J'darin
Description: J'darin gets bad news from home.
Location: Dolphin Cove Weyr
Date: month 5, day 9 of Turn 5
Silence reigned in his weyr - high above the sea, lonely save for a bronze dragon and his dark-haired rider.
He had already read the letter about 10 times.
And still, there were no tears.
At a loss, he went out to Hasaarth, who lay sunning on the ledge. The view from their high weyr was beautiful, and faced away from the main Weyr, which suited his mood at the moment.
}:Your sire has gone /between/.:{ Hasaarth stated it as a fact, simple.
"Well, he died, yes. But I don't feel anything, Hasaarth. ANYTHING." He spoke aloud, as if hearing the words might make a bigger impact.
It didn't.
Confused, his dragon said, }:Why does this disturb you? If my sire went /between/ I would mourn as all dragons do, and then it would be over. You do not mourn, though. Perhaps you should keen as a dragon and you will feel better. :{
Unable to stop himself, J'darin laughed. Perhaps he should keen. Shaking his head, the laughter faded as abruptly as it began and he stretched down beside Hasaarth, in the sun.
He had endured these months under N'vanik's time as Weyrleader with barely any contact with anyone. He almost never spoke to Traelyn any longer and she seemed much happier with N'vanik as her Weyrleader than when he had been. He had endured the whispers and the comments, and he had endured N'vanik putting a barely tried pup of a bronzerider in charge of _his_ weyrlings.
And when he asked, he had been told that he wasn't to be trusted. He snorted. Not to be _trusted_? He had more experience than almost all the bronzeriders at Dolphin Cove and had been nothing but excellent as a Wingsecond, Weyrlingmaster Second, Weyrlingmaster, and Weyrleader. Apparently their current Weyrleader knew better than any of the previous Weyrleaders before him, as they had all used …and in some cases abused… the few experienced bronzeriders they had to the best of their abilities. But not him.
He had endured that.. and so much more. He had closed off all his friends. He hadn't spoken even to Zelle, much, though he had visited her sometimes. He wasn't even sure why he had closed himself off from everyone, especially Zelle, except that he was trying to endure… and be supportive… and endure… all at once. It left little for anything but Hasaarth and Thread.
And now when faced with something else.. his father's death… he simply felt.. nothing.
The only feelings he could stir were for his mother and sister, who would now be at Amber Hills without his father. Would they turn them out of the Hall? Surely not. Neither of them had any crafting to fall back on, of course, and would simply be reduced to drudges, most likely, without his father's Master Crafter status to support them. He just wasn't sure what would happen to them now. His younger brother was long gone, following his Craft wherever it took him, and that left only him. Only J'darin to see to his family.
He could almost hear his father's voice. "Your duty is to take care of them."
But he was a _dragonrider_ and a _bronze_rider even. What could he do for them?
}:It would be interesting to return to the place I was Hatched. The place I found you.:{ Hasaarth sent suddenly, throwing his rider into complete shock.
**WHAT? You want to go back to Dragonsfall?**
}:I want whatever will make you happy. You are mine and I am yours. I want whatever you want, and you want to take care of your family:{ Hasaarth had guessed from his rider's thoughts that Dragonsfall meant being closer to his family and being able to care for them, perhaps.
Stunned, J'darin was silent.
He had toyed with the idea, of course. His relationship with the fiery Kapera had certainly played an interesting part in that thought process, and also the fact that he had experience and skills that apparently no one had any need for at Dolphin Cove. But they _did_ have need of them at Dragonsfall. She had told him so, a few months ago.
More than rank, more than anything.. .. he only wanted to be _needed_.
Maybe, just maybe.
He had not wanted to run from Dolphin Cove. He loved the people and considered them _his_ even though Weyrleaders changed on the whim of the senior queen and they were not his any longer. He loved the sun, and he had made a home here. He had become _himself_ here.
Accidents, Hurricanes, Thread, Untimely Deaths, Gaining and losing the Weyrleadership – they had all played a role in the burning away of the _extra_ in him. What was left had been honed to perfection and sharpness and he knew it as intimately as he knew Hasaarth. The crucible of life, here, had shaped him.
No, he had not wanted to leave.
Echoes of his father's voice came again, followed by Hasaarth's mental voice.
"It is your duty to take care of them."
}:It would be interesting to return to the place I was Hatched. The place I found you.:{
Silence reigned in his weyr - high above the sea, lonely save for a bronze dragon and his dark-haired rider.
Last updated on the November 3rd 2009