Bad Days (2)

Writers: AL, Elyriel
Date Posted: 20th January 2009

Characters: Zelle, T'marek
Description: T'marek runs into Zelle while she's depressed and tries to cheer her up.
Location: Dolphin Cove Weyr
Date: month 13, day 20 of Turn 4

He seemed to think it was a matter of confidence - at least, that's what Zelle got from T'marek's words. How wrong he was. To be honest, Zelle herself didn't know why she was having a bad day. They had come before, yes, but there was never any explanation for them that she could see. They just..happened. The grief would hit her all over again, dragging her down. Maybe coming with T'marek was a bad idea. She had thought it might distract her, but it didn't seem to be doing any good. "Look...I should just go." She came a stop, just a few feet from the door to the brownrider's weyr.

Hanging his head, T'marek nodded. "Yeah, okay." He said, looking for all the world like she'd just crushed his favorite thing in the world. "I'm not very good at this. I should have just let you be. I only made things worse." Walking to his weyr, he opened the door. "Take care."

Well that just made things worse. Zelle sighed and followed T'marek. "Well...at least show me your carvings before I go."

He looked at her, shaking his head. "You don't have to, Zelle." That was probably the first time he'd actually called her by her name. "Go find someone to cheer you up." T'marek tried to force a smile, but his lack of practice made the attempt even worse. "I'll show you some other time." Which was a lie... he had every intention of avoiding her from here on out. This was why he didn't get close to people. When they hurt, you hurt.

"No. You said you would show me, so show me." Zelle didn't give T'marek a chance to protest any further. She slipped through the door and into the weyr, stopping in the middle of the main room and turned to look back at the brownrider.

With a resigned sigh, T'marek nodded. "Fine." He said, knowing her well enough by now to know she wouldn't take no for an answer. Entering the weyr, he went to his sleeping room, pulled out a small wooden chest and opened it. Inside were all the things he'd felt it important to keep. Not taking the time to look through it all, he pulled out the first two pieces he'd ever made and brought them out to her. Opening her hand, he plopped them in there. "Now, see if you can tell what they're supposed to be."

Zelle took the pieces and concentrated on one of them. She turned it over in her hands, studying the wood. To be honest, she had no idea what it was, but she didn't say it at first. Surely she could get some idea if she just looked at it long enough.

One side of the brownrider's lips lifted in a sardonic smile. "Yeah, if I didn't know what I was trying to make, I wouldn't be able to guess either." He told her. "But at least you could tell yours was a fish."

"A very sick looking fish." Zelle remarked, then went on to study the second one.

"Uh... no." He almost smiled, the action lighting his eyes but not spreading across his face. "It's a dragon. Not a very good one, but..." The brownrider shrugged.

"A runner?" Zelle asked as she held the second piece out to him. At least, she thought it was a runner. She hoped anyway.

A look of surprise shot across T'marek's face. "Yeah, you guessed. I'm impressed. I could barely tell what it is and I know what I was trying to make."

"Well, it looks like one." It didn't really, at least, not unless you studied it closely, but Zelle wanted to be nice. "Got any more?"

"A bunch, but they don't really get a whole lot better." He turned and headed back into his room again, taking out the wooden chest. Rather than getting out what he wanted, he just brought it back in the other room with him. "There's this one... it's probably the best one I've done so far."

"A dragon." Zelle stated immediately She stared down at the carving, turning it over and over in her hands.

"Is your sister a dragonrider?" The question came suddenly, out of the blue without any sort of reference. Why had she asked that question? Zelle couldn't say. She had tried to avoid the topic of family, but for some reason she wanted to know. He had brought his sister up and she supposed the curiosity couldn't be contained any longer.

Lifting his head, T'marek looked at her, something undefinable crossing his features. "No." His voice got quiet. "No, last I heard she apprenticed to the healer hall, but that was a very, very long time ago."

"You don't talk to her?" Zelle's already solemn expression became more so as her frown deepened. "Why?"

"It's a long story." The brownrider replied. "I didn't leave on the best of terms when I left home... then I impressed..." T'marek shrugged. "Time just seemed to slip by so fast."

"It does go by fast." Zelle agreed, her hand tightening over the carving. "And it slips away so fast... you think you'll have a chance to say goodbye, but suddenly they aren't there anymore and all you can think about is the things you could have done, should have said, even if you had a good relationship to begin with." The tears threatened again and Zelle reachd up to wipe them away on her sleeve.

Reaching out, T'marek patted her shoulder awkwardly. "Yeah... but no matter what they're still always with you." He tapped his head. "Here..." Then he tapped his heart. "And here."

"Yes, I know." Zelle _did_ know that, but it didn't make the ache go away. It didn't make the grief disappear. The greenrider reached out and took T'marek's hand, then placed the carving into it. "You should go see your sister."

The brownrider shook his head. "No, she probably doesn't remember me very well. And I doubt there was much good said about me after I left." He took the dragon carving and handed it back to her, placing it in her palm and curling her fingers around it. "She's better off with what memories she has of me."

"But she's your sister." Zelle pressed gently. "She's family. Family is important. You should at least see how she's doing."

A muscle in T'marek's jaw ticked as he clenched it. "No, Zelle." He said quietly. "Trust me, she's better off. It was a very long time ago."

"I'd be better off with my brother." Zelle muttered. She ducked her head and stuff. "I'll quit bothering you now."

His features drew into a deep frown. "You're not bothering me, Zelle. You just don't understand..." Sighing, T'marek shook his head. "Nevermind, okay. I can't explain it. I hope you get to feeling better."

"Yeah, thanks." The greenrider managed a small smile. "I'll catch you later, okay?"

T'marek shrugged. "Sure. Later." The brownrider said, picking up the pieces he'd shown her. Next time he'd mind his own business. He knew better.

Zelle started toward the door, then stopped. Impulsively, she moved back to the brownrider and drew him into a hug. "Thanks."

Standing awkwardly, T'marek finally lifted a hand and patted her as if she were delicate glass that might break. "You're welcome." Although what she was thanking him for he had no idea. He'd only made things worse.

"I'll see you later." Zelle gave him one more squeeze before releasing him. She hurried out of the weyr, eager to retreat to privacy. She needed a good cry and that was something she wanted to do alone.

Last updated on the January 22nd 2009

Welcome to Triad Weyrs!

Bad Days (2)