The Path Not Taken

Writers: Dana, Eimi
Date Posted: 17th September 2007

Characters: B'ram, Traelyn
Description: B'ram helps Trae celebrate her birthday
Location: Dolphin Cove Weyr
Date: month 5, day 19 of Turn 4

B'ram

}:So can she come?:{ Girifith asked, peeking a big eye into his rider's weyr.

"Yes, yes, just give me a moment..." B'ram felt nearly frantic as he found his candles. **I knew it. I _knew_ it!** his mind screamed, almost triumphantly. He knew Trae would come to him. It was her birthday, but he knew she'd come to him to celebrate. And he was ready.
Shards, at least he hoped he was ready. His hands almost shook as he lit the candles around the room. Candlelight, not glowlight. That was important. He wanted this night to be special. B'ram wasn't quite sure why he was putting so much effort into this. It was only Trae. And yet, it was _Trae_. The distinction confused even himself. But he wanted to impress her, to romance her, to make the night special for more than just his own personal gratification. If he tried to think of the reasons why, he'd just go nuts. Rather than think too deeply, he set the glasses on the table and hid the bottle of wine in a handy spot.

**All right,** he told his brown, running his fingers through his hair once more, knowing no amount of grooming would tame it but it was habit. Straightening his tunic once more he gave his lifemate the go-ahead. **Ask her to come in.**

Moments later the door opened and Traelyn slowly slipped inside. She was dressed casually, but nicely, and her long, pale hair was tied back from her face in a loose braid, exposing her large, dark eyes. Her hands were clasped nervously together, her gaze reflecting that emotion as she looked at B'ram. Then her eyes flickered to the two glasses, the candles. A part of her was slightly surprised to find that he'd gone through an effort for her. Shards, and all that did was make her feel more like a fool. And a pathetic one at that. But she couldn't be alone tonight.
Especially since U'kaiah hadn't come. No.....she just couldn't face the night alone.

Traelyn forced herself to come further into his weyr, silently berating herself for her nerves. "Hey."

"Hi." He mustered a smile. He felt like an idiot. "Happy birthday."

When she was an arm's length away from him she paused, returning his smile rather hesitantly. "Thanks." Then she looked down, tracing her nail against the palm of her other hand. "Another Turn older....I don't feel it." It was a predictable thing to say, but shards, it was better than having an awkward silence envelope them.

"You don't look it, either." The compliment sounded rather cliche, but he really meant it. "Of course, you were always beautiful, even when you were too young to know it."

It was annoying that such a simple statement made her blush slightly.
Deciding to evade replying, she changed the subject. "With every Turn that passes... Shards, B'ram. Sometimes I want to go back to being young again."

"Things were simpler then," he nodded. Or were they. Even then, Trae had a way of causing ripples through their group of boys, whether she realized it or not. She was just one of those girls. Always had been.
Always would be. "Won't you sit down?"

"Much simpler," she agreed as she eased down onto the sofa.

"I got you a present," B'ram said, deciding to change the subject. He reached under the sofa to pull out the bottle he had hidden there as he slipped onto the cushion next to her. "I hope you don't mind."

"Mind? Oh no," she told him, a little shocked as he placed the bottle in her hands. Though why should she be, especially since he had put effort into making his weyr look...nice? Shards. "Thank you.
Ooooh.... This is from the north." Meaning that it cost more than a southern bottle would. Traelyn looked up at him. "You didn't have to do this."

"It's an iced wine. They still have a large stock up North." It had been hard to come by down here in the south after the Amethyst Cliff Vinter Hall's stash had been all but destroyed in the quake. Of course, the reason he knew where to look was because he had been up there finding wine for he and Eleada to enjoy. He almost winced at the guilt of that thought. He had told her he couldn't visit tonight because he was consoling an old friend. Of course, it was a half truth, but he conveniently left out the part about intending to screw the old friend from sundown to sun up. He tried to force thoughts of the greenrider from his mind as he reached for glasses. "Shall we open it?"

A loud pop sounded in the weyr and Traelyn quickly filled both glasses.
After carefully setting the bottle down on the table, she took one of the glasses he offered, tucking on leg up onto the couch. She wondered what was going through his mind as their eyes met, as their glasses clinked together in a silent toast.

The brownrider took a sip thoughtfully, his eyes never leaving her face.
Licking the wine from his lips, his thoughts returned to a Turn before, to a family birthday celebration. He hadn't wanted to go, but Atreyn had insisted. B'ram would have done anything to please her then. Even go to Traelyn's birthday dinner. "You know, if you told me a Turn ago you and I would be celebrating your birthday together like this, I would never have believed it."

"Me neither," she snorted. "If you had told me... I think I would've laughed." And derisively, too. But she didn't need to say that.

"It's funny how things can change in a Turn..." In a few months, even.

"Yeah...." Shards, this time last Turn, she and B'ram hardly spoke, and if they did speak, it was to trade vicious barbs and sly insults. This time last Turn, she was preparing herself for the move to Dragonsfall Weyr, where she would meet N'vanik, and U'kaiah. U'kaiah... Lowering eyes, she studied the glass she held. "It is."

"Course, I used to imagine celebrating your birthday like this when we were kids. I tended to skip over the wine and the candles though." A slight smile turned the corners of his lips. Traelyn used to be in several of his earliest fantasies about girls. She was in all their fantasies, he knew.

She glanced at him. "Wanted to get right to the more exciting, ah, moments, hmm?" Her tone was quiet, a little serious, but a little coy as well. Mentally she berated herself for it, but she sharding couldn't help it. To cover her lapse of judgment, she took another long sip of her wine.

"Come on, Trae. You know we all wanted you." Her embarrassment made him feel a little uncomfortable as he downed a healthy gulp.

"Now I do. But back then..." She shrugged. "I didn't. I was ignorant for a while. Especially...especially with you."

"Me?" he asked, genuinely surprised.

"Yeah."

B'ram felt his was missing something. "Wait," he said as he set his glass aside and turned to face her. "What are you talking about? When were you confused about _me_?"

His tone made her feel defensive and she leaned back away from his intense scrutiny. "I didn't know how you felt until..." She made an impatient gesture with her hand. "Until after we kissed. The first time." And shards, that had been disastrous. But they had already talked about this... Shards, she hadn't meant to bring it up again. She didn't want to talk about it.

He was intrigued. He propped his elbow against the back of the sofa and leaned his head on his hand. "So... Then would it have made a difference if you _had_ known before?" It was all ancient history now, but he was curious. Had he had a chance with her? Even with L'kub pining away for her?

"Maybe." Her eyes were unreadable when she looked up at him again.
"But I loved him, B'ram."

"I know," he said softly. It was amazing how they could talk about her feelings for L'kub now without accusation or guilt. But still, knowing that there might have been a chance... It hurt a little to think he had come in second, even to his best friend. "You could have had any of us at a word. Why him, Trae? Why not... Why did you choose him?"

Her temper flared. "We chose each other," she snapped. "Shells, you make it sound like...like I was a gold in heat, leading her boys on a merry chase and finally choosing one on a whim. I might have _become_
like that later, but it wasn't like that with him!" Then, realizing what she had just admitted, out loud, she clamped her jaw shut so tight it hurt.

"I wasn't saying that, Trae," B'ram said, reaching for her hand. He knew her. He knew her temper flared when there were deeper feelings that she was afraid to show. "Why L'kub? Why not me?"

She shook her head.

"All right," he whispered, leaning in to kiss her jaw softly. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to upset you."

Before he could pull away completely, she turned her face, brushing the tip of her nose against his cheek in a small caress, temper fading. "He was there first," she whispered against his skin, tone filled with guilt. The words poured from her, and she didn't know why. Shards, she didn't owe him an explanation. But that didn't stop her from wanting to give him one.
"And then it became more. It became real."

B'ram didn't pull away, but instead nuzzled her back, his hand falling to the base of her neck, gently massaging the tense muscles. "He was always more in touch with his feeling than I was. I had no idea what do to about the way I felt." Shards, they had been so young then. It was funny, though, how fresh it felt again. "He was the better choice," he admitted softly as his hand slipped from her fingers to her thigh.
Maybe it was the wine. Or the way her skin glowed in the candlelight.
Or just the fact that maybe for one night they could go back in time and find out how the path not taken might have ended. "Still, it makes you wonder..." **What if I had been first?**

"Would we be different people than we are right now?" she wondered, voice a little breathy as they drew closer, hands gently exploring.
"Would we have stayed at Far Island, together still, after all of these Turns?" Or would she had still strayed to other men's beds? And if she had, would she have eventually come back to him? Her eyes closed as her hand finally slipped up his shirt, fingers tracing his spine, feeling his flesh warm to her touch. "Or would we have eventually driven each other insane with our tempers?" Her tongue flicked against his neck. It was a little scary to think about the what-might-have-beens with B'ram. Scary, but, for the moment, fitting.

His fingers curled into the fabric of her dress, inching it tantalizingly higher. Would she have broken his heart like her sister did? Would he have been like L'kub and thought she had been worth it?
Would she be sitting with L'kub now wondering what if? Would he be sitting with Atreyn wondering if he had chosen the right sister? Or would they have been the perfect match after all? "I always thought we'd drive each other insane in other ways," he murmured, his voice low and rich.

"Mmmm." She arched her back slowly as desire curled through her, and a faint smile began to tease at her lips. Her expression was languid as she rested her head back against the cushion, fingertips trailing around to his stomach. "Care to elaborate on what you mean?"

B'ram's lips caressed hers as he breathed her in. "How about we make it a team effort?"

"Mmm...you give a little, and I'll give a little. I like the sound of that."

He smiled as his fingertips finally touched bare skin. "It's how a relationship should be."

Last updated on the September 17th 2007

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The Path Not Taken