Hard To Fix (part 2 of 2)

Writers: AmajoS, Bree
Date Posted: 4th April 2007

Characters: Anarya, S'manar
Description: Anarya find herself biting off more than she can chew at the Goldflight.
Location: Dolphin Cove Weyr
Date: month 2, day 19 of Turn 4

Anayra sat on the floor across the room from where the bronzerider lay on the couch. She trembled slightly as she watched him sleeping, as she had for a good three candlemarks now. She could still feel his hands all over her in a confusing mix of pain and real pleasure. His hands were curled slightly now, not looking nearly as strong and demanding as she knew they were. She had the bruises on her skin to prove it.

Staring at him, she suddenly realized she didn't even know his name.
This realization filled her with shame and the strident voice of her mother filled her head. Common weyr-bred strumpet, her mother would say. Bedding a man she didn't even know! Anayra shuddered, taking a deep breath that turned into a sob.

The bronzerider stirred on the couch and she slapped a hand over her mouth in a desperate and futile attempt to quiet herself.

The noise was odd enough to make S'manar crack one eye open, the world seeming a little groggy. "Hello?"

She felt trapped now. Why hadn't she left while he was sleeping?
Unsure what to do, and not wanting to call any attention to herself, she didn't answer. She just stared at him with wide eyes as she tried to control the shuddering breaths and keep herself quiet.

S'manar rubbed at his eyes and sat up with a groan. "Shards, we didn't even make it to the b--" His voice cut off as he saw Anayra huddled in on herself. His stomach sank as guilt rose sharply within him. What had he _done_? "Are you all right?"

Any other time, the deep concern evident in his voice and manner would have appealed to her. If they'd passed in the hallway and she'd seen this stranger - and he was a stranger, despite how he'd kown her body
- looking at her with such concern, she'd have been quite moved. Even now, she wished that expression was for her, but it wasn't. His concern couldn't be for her, not when he'd treated her so roughly.

"No," she whispered softly, her voice strained. She was not alright.
Torn by shame and guilt and fear and a strange growing anger, she wasn't sure she'd ever be alright.

S'manar staggered to his feet and forced the sluggish exhaustion back enough to look at the girl. **Shards... shards, shards, shards...**

}:What is wrong?:{ He struggled to pull his pants on, not wanting to approach the cringing girl until he had managed it. **I need to take her to see a healer.**

}:She was hurt?:{ His dragon's voice sounded concerned. }:Are you hurt, too?:{ As he fastened his pants, he glanced over his shoulder at the girl and fought back a stab of guilt. **Not in the same way.** He struggled into his tunic and then turned, still afraid to approach her. "Can I take you to see a healer?"

She wanted to scream, more than anything she'd ever wanted, for him to not come near her. But the look in his eyes confused her. He really genuinely looked sorry. Could a person -fake- that much concern? So, she didn't scream. She was so confused.

The idea of a healer sounded particularly good at the moment though.
Her body reminded her of it's aches and pains quite forcefully after he mentioned seeing a healer. She hadn't really been aware of it before that moment. Not really. But she was now and fresh tears fell as she nodded in reply.

He took a cautious step forward, then paused. "Do you need help getting up? I could--I could carry you." He could only imagine what she would think of that. "Or I could go get the healer and bring him here, if you want." Anything to make her stop looking at him with those terrified, tear-filled eyes.

She initially flinched at the idea of him carrying her, or even taking her hand to help her up. The memory of those hands was too fresh for that. But then the idea of leaving this room suddenly terrified her.
There was a whole Weyr full of people outside that door. They would take one look at her and -know- what had gone on in this room. Know that she'd bedded a man she didn't even know. Her mother's voice filled her head again with spiteful invectives.

"Here! Please, bring one here?" She pled, her voice choked with tears.
She hoped that the concern she saw was really real and really for her.
That he wouldn't make her go out there where everyone would -see-.

"Of course," he said hastily, backing toward the door. "Of course...
I'll be right back." Panicked by the sight of her tears, he nearly stumbled in his hurry to reach the door. **Shards, this is going to be hard to fix...**

Last updated on the April 6th 2007

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Hard To Fix (part 2 of 2)