We Need To Talk (2/2)

Writers: Dana, Devin
Date Posted: 14th March 2006

Characters: N'vanik, Traelyn
Description: Traelyn confronts N'vanik about why he left.
Location: Dragonsfall Weyr
Date: month 10, day 25 of Turn 3

N'vanik

With his body still trembling slightly, N'vanik collapsed on top of Traelyn, face half buried in her hair. It was always different with her.
It was always . . . more.

Her lips brushed across his shoulder as she shifted slightly, bringing one arm up rest across his back. She kept her eyes closed, but sleep was the furthest thing from her mind. Traelyn knew he was still awake, that he hadn't gone right to sleep.

But she didn't know what she could say to him.

They laid still and silent for several heartbeats before she gently began to trace the tips of her nails up and down his spine, following the curve and dip down and back up again.

"And you accused me of using you for sex," he whispered into her ear.

Her hand stilled over his skin, her eyes squeezing tightly shut. Those words, no matter how he meant them, struck too close to home. That wound she and B'ram had delt to one another was still fresh...and painful.

Shards and shells... She was such a scorching hypocrite.

"I was under the impression that this was mutual?" Her voice was very soft, holding nothing to suggest that his words had shaken a part of her she wanted to push aside and ignore.

He lifted his head and looked at her. "Why did you come here? I know I'm good, but you seemed more interested in yelling when you showed up."

She searched his eyes for a long moment before lowering them. "I came here because I wanted to know your reasons for leaving me like you did. Surely I made that as obvious as I possibly could?" Her tone held a hint of dry humor, but not directed at him.

N'vanik gave a resigned sigh. "I left because you deserve better than someone who gets into fights with his Wingleader. Better than someone who gets into shouting matches with you every other sevenday."

Before she realized it, she was trailing the back of her finger down his cheek. Traelyn met his eyes. "You mean someone like you."

"Yes."

Traelyn frowned, unsettled. "Why?"

He tilted his head. "What? You don't think you do?"

"It doesn't make sense, N'vanik. You've never _once_ told me this before.
Not once." She looked up at him. "What's changed?"

"It's just something I realized." He moved off her and sat on the edge of the couch. "That's all."

Traelyn laid there for a moment, frowning up at the ceiling of his weyr. It seemed as though he was putting her up on a pedestal - and she didn't like it. Not one bit. It wasn't like the bronzerider she knew.

Or she thought she had known.

And she certainly didn't deserve it.

Slowly she raised herself just enough so her head could rest comfortably on the arm of the sofa. "I want you to think about something."

"What?" N'vanik stared at the table, littered with with empty and partially empty bottles.

"If what you're saying is true, I wouldn't be here right now, would I?"

He was going to argue that, but instead he asked, "Why do you put up with me?" It was something he'd been wondering for months.

A dry, half-smile curved her lips at that, but it did give her pause. Why _did_ she? A silence stretched between them. It wasn't uneasy, not really, but it wasn't exactly comfortable either.

Traelyn watched him stare ahead at the bottles scattered across the table, his hair falling in his eyes, his body so still. Slowly she shifted until she was sitting upright, then she moved until she was sitting near him, barely touching. "That's a good question," she told him softly as her gaze followed his. But even as she said the words, her hand slid to his arm, slipping down until she could gently touch his hand.

N'vanik had the ghost of a smile for a second or two before it fell away.
"You could have anyone you want. Why waste your time with me?"

"Who says I'm wasting my time?" Her dark eyes flickered to his face - but it was still turned from her. "I don't think that I am. But..."

"But what?"

"But it's a different story if you don't want me here."

He sighed. "It's not that I don't want you. I was just trying to keep you from . . . being hurt."

"So you went without a _word_ to me for at least two sevendays - to keep me from getting hurt? You have interesting logic, N'vanik." Her tone was quiet, but not angry.

"I was hoping you'd get over me."

She stiffened, then looked away. The irritation was beginning to slip back in - and just when she thought they were going to reach a sharding understanding. She took in a deep breath, trying to force it back. "I see." Her hand fell from his. The underlying arrogance in his words stung at her pride, but they also stung at something deeper - deeper than she was willing to even think about.

He turned toward her. "See? I'm hurting you right now." And it hurt him to say it.

Traelyn searched his eyes. "Do you want me to leave? Is that what you want, N'vanik? Is that what you _really_ want?"

He almost lied. It was on the tip of his tongue. One little word that could make her go, maybe for good. But he couldn't do it. "No."

"Then stop trying to push me away."

"You know I'll hurt you," he said, looking at her. "That we'll fight."

"We already have." A wry smile curved her lips. "And do you see me running?"

"No. I see you sitting naked on my couch." He couldn't hold back a smile.

Her dark eyes flickered, and she looked down, grinning.

N'vanik laughed, and for the first time in sevendays he felt _happy_.

Last updated on the March 18th 2006

Welcome to Triad Weyrs!

We Need To Talk (2/2)