What Could Have Been

Writers: AL, Heather
Date Posted: 29th November 2015

Characters: Barenziah, Z'lred
Description: Barenziah attends a wedding with Z'lred and sees someone unexpected.
Location: Dolphin Cove Weyr
Date: month 3, day 1 of Turn 8
Notes: Mentioned: Zathris (cameo?)

Barenziah

Two gold combs held Barenziah's flaming red hair back away from her
face, allowing the slightly curled mass to cascade freely down her
back. For the first time in a while she wore a tailored dress similar
to what she would have worn back at the Hold. One of her childhood
friends was marrying some minor Lord and not only had she been invited
to attend (which had been a shock in itself since women who left the
Hold life weren't often invited back) but Z'lred had agreed to be her
escort while she was there.

Even though she was getting more accustomed to life at Dolphin Cove,
especially since she had started her healing apprenticeship, Barenziah
still missed the life she'd left behind at Amber Hills. She'd wanted
more freedom but Barenziah had never dreamed of traveling to the Weyr
permanently.

~~Big friend here!~~ Chiffon fluttered excitedly over Barenziah's
hair, her gold hide flashing brilliantly from the sunlight that
filtered in through the window.

"Hi Berry." Z'lred's cheerful baritone proceeded his presence. As he
stepped around the corner to where he had agreed to meet Barenziah,
his grin widened. While not the sort to wear formal clothing on a
daily basis, especially since his job demanded more rugged wear, he
was also aware enough of etiquette to make sure he did dress
appropriately when the situation called for it. A burnt umber tunic
was edged in gold while black trousers and boots accented the more
brilliant tones of his shirt. Over his arm hung a jacket of deep
read, a nicer version for traveling on dragonback so that he did not
freeze in the frigid/between/. "You ready to go?"

It was still weird when Z'lred called her "Berry" as that had been
something that only Zathris had done back home. "You look very nice."
she told Z'lred as she looked over his outfit. Grabbing her
short-waisted leather jacket, Barenziah shrugged it on for the
/between/ trip, "All set."

"Good. Have anyone you plan to see besides that friend getting
married?" Z'lred was not ignorant of what Holdfolk thought of
Weyrfolk, particularly women who traveled to the Weyr and remained
there for more than a short visit. One of the reasons he had agreed
to escort her was so he could remain and keep an eye on her. "I don't
mind staying a bit longer if you do."

"Oh, no, there's no one else really." Barenziah didn't imagine that
she would receive a very warm reception so she planned on seeing her
friend, congratulating her, and then getting back to the Weyr.

"Well, if you change your mind, let me know. I don't have any other
plans for the day. Just you." Z'lred winked and then motioned toward
the massive brown who waited for them. "Shall we?"

Once they were settled onto the dragon and in the air, Barenziah
couldn't hide her smile. Flying was one of the things she enjoyed most
about being at the Weyr, especially since Z'lred was usually
accommodating in taking her up in the air every now and then.

When they arrived at the Minor Hold in the Amber Hills Territory there
was an immediate temperature difference. Barenziah was surprised to
discover that she actually missed the cooler temperatures of the area
she had grown up in. The sun and sea were nice, and she loved them
too, but there was something about the crisp cool air of Amber Hills
that couldn't be replaced.

Z'lred dismounted first and offered a hand to his passenger, a smile still
present upon his face. After she was settled on the ground, he took his
jacket and hers, folded them carefully, and placed them in a satchel that
was attached to his dragon's straps. After fondly patting the ruddy hide,
he turned back to Barenziah and offered his arm. "Lead the way."

The Main Hall was filled with ladies in beautiful dresses, and men sharply
dressed in their Gather best. Eyes turned to regard Barenziah and Z'lred as
they entered. A dragonrider always drew attention, as did Barenziah's
flaming red hair. There were several familiar faces in the room, but
Barenziah noted with disappointment that they all were quick to avoid
making eye contact as she entered.

**What were you expecting? You know this is just how it is.** She'd grown
up at the Hold, she had _been_ one of those people who whispered behind
their hand about the scandalous women that returned from the Weyr.

Although Z'lred hadn't missed those sidelong glances and the sudden turning
away when they were looked at, he also wasn't going to let it bother him,
nor would he allow Barenziah to have a miserable time. "Look at all those
lovely ladies." He commented, then leaned over to murmur only to her. "Not
half as pretty as you."

The brownrider straightened and this time it was he who took the lead as he
drew further into the room. Reds and blues, greens and golds, burnt orange
and pinks, all sorts of colours sparkled from every corner. Some women
bore dresses with sleeves as full as puff pastries while others sported
more demure. For a moment, Z'lred wondered if he'd stepped into some
psychedelic rainbow. Once again, he leaned down so it was only she who
could hear him. "Please tell me they're going to have food here."

Barenziah stifled a laugh behind her hand as her other one jabbed Z'lred in
the ribs, "Of course, once the ceremony is over. Shhh, it's about to
begin." As if on cue the healer officiating directed everyone to take their
seats. These ceremonies weren't usually long, especially since the
celebration afterwards tended to last all evening.

"Ah, the boring part." Z'lred murmured, ignoring the slight, sharp pain
thanks to that pointy elbow of hers. He was going to have to get back at
her for that one. As the Healer continued on, Z'lred dutifully watched.
The usual things were said, promises made, promises that were expected to
be kept but often weren't. He wondered how many promises would be broken
between that couple. Finally, the healer came to the end of the ceremony
and the couple were finally, and officially married.

"Good. Does that mean we eat now?" Although he wouldn't normally bother
lowering his voice because he honestly didn't care what the holders thought
of him, he was aware that Barenziah might. Z'lred continued to keep his
voice down so that only she could hear his comments.

Barenziah's lips once again fought off a smile, "Yes, we can go get some
refreshments now." People were leaving the chairs and beginning to mill
back out into the open room where tables of food had been prepared. Already
a line had formed to congratulate the bride and groom. "Do we want to get
in that line now, or have something to eat and wait for it to die down
some?"

"If we wait, you might be able to converse a little longer with your friend
whereas if we go now, you'll barely get a sentence in." Z'lred suggested
as he observed the already substantial line. Although he was hungry, he
didn't want to deny his companion the chance to mingle with those she cared
about, and he wanted to ensure she got the most out of the visit. "Why
don't we calm our rumbling bellies and then bespeak your friend?"

"That sounds wonderful." Barenziah followed Z'lred to the refreshment table
and put a few light things on her plate, cheeses, fruits, and a couple of
finger sandwiches. Even though everything was going smoothly so far her
stomach still had not completely unknotted itself over the looks and
whispers they had received upon arrival.

After sitting down at a table along the wall, Barenziah began nibbling on
her food as her eyes scanned the room. It was weird being back among Hold
people again, she had thought that she would feel more at home among
them... but she didn't. Not anymore, nor did she truly feel like she
belonged to the Weyr either. Her blue eyes looked back toward the line of
people waiting to greet the bride and groom. She was just about to look
away when her eyes snagged on a very familiar profile: Zathris.

Her heart slowed to a dull slug in her chest as she studied the handsome
Lord Holder's profile. What was he doing there? She had never imagined that
he would make a personal appearance at this wedding. **I should not have
come.** It was the first time she had laid eyes on him since leaving Amber
Hills. He looked even better in person than he did in her dreams. Feeling
suddenly nervous, and afraid of being noticed, Barenziah ducked her head
and looked back down at her plate, suddenly not hungry at all.

There were certain things that particularly drew a man's attention. One
of those things was a a beautiful woman. The other was a plate full of
food. After procuring a rather decent piling, Z'lred settled himself
across from Barenziah. The fowl legs perched upon his plate were plump and
tantalizing, and he'd added a couple of other meats in addition to a few
goodies that one wouldn't normally eat. Tiny tarts tempted him from the
outskirts of the plate, but he decided to eat some of the protein before
delving into the sugar. His teeth tore into the leg and he munched on it
happily. "At least they provide good food here." Several more bites were
taken before he realised that not only had Barenziah gone quiet, she seemed
to cower into the corner. "Hey, what's wrong?"

"Zathris is here." she replied dully. Her fingers picked apart one of the
sandwiches she'd picked up, tearing the bread into tiny pieces.

"Huh?" Z'lred turned in his chair and caught sight of his bright.
Although his first instinct was to call to his sibling, the sight of
Barenziah's face when he turned back around was enough to stifle that
desire. "You okay?"

She was not okay. She felt sick. "Can we leave?"

"Yeah, of course, but are you sure?" Z'lred hadn't know Zathris would
attend the wedding. While he thought she should stay for her friend, he
didn't want her to be uncomfortable.

"I am sure. Please take me home." Barenziah's heart felt like it was lodged
in her throat, and hot tears pressed at the backs of her eyes as emotions
she thought she'd buried resurfaced.

Z'lred glanced back at his brother once more, but decided he would just
have to make his apologies for not saying hello later. With a gentle hand
upon her arm, the brownrider helped her up and escorted her out before
anyone could really offer a second glance. Without a word spoken between
them, they traversed their way through the corridors and out into the
sunshine where a breeze immediately teased the fiery tresses. The gorgeous
day didn't seem to lighten the expression that coloured her face and
Z'lred's frown deepened. He motioned to the massive brown who's head
lifted from where he'd been resting it upon his forelegs and watched the
approach of the two humans.

Barenziah's eyes remained staring straight ahead at the brown dragon as
they walked. Her jaw was clenched as she fought the urge to cry. **You will
not cry, Barenziah. You haven't seen him in months. He hasn't thought about
you, clearly, so why should you be so upset at just _seeing_ him. Now
Z'lred is going to think you are silly.**

Despite her attempts to remain calm and collected, Z'lred could tell she
was quite upset. For a few moments, he wondered if he should say
something, but he had no idea what. Anything that came to mind seemed
rather stupid, so instead he remained silent. After helping her into her
jacket and onto the dragon, he glanced behind her. So where should they
go? She had said home, but Z'lred had a different idea.

The trio launched into the air and blinked /between/. A breath later, they
appeared not over the Weyr, but over an enormous field littered with a
rainbow array of flowers nestled in between tall grasses which swayed in a
steady, serene breeze. At the end of the field, trees stood in an irregular
line, marking the edge of a forest. The dragon landed and Z'lred
positioned himself to help his passenger down.

During the short flight a few of Barenziah's tears had escaped. She looked
around in confusion as she wiped the moisture from her cheeks. "Where are
we?"

"A place almost as pretty as you are." Z'lred dismounted onto the leg of
his dragon and rid himself of his jacket. "I come here when I need to calm
down, get away from things." He offered a hand to help the young woman
down. "Thought it might be nice to come here."

Before coming to live at the Weyr, Barenziah probably would have blushed a
little at the compliment, but that was before she had been the Lord
Holder's mistress. "Thank you, Z'lred... it's beautiful." She reached up
and pulled out the broach that had held the shawl around her shoulders in
place.

"If we keep walking that way and over to where it drops down a hill,
there's a nice stream that cuts through and is pleasant to walk in."
Wherever they were, it was warm enough to wade if they so desire and Z'lred
had done so many times. "Sometimes you can see miniature fish swimming
along as well as colourful insects that dance on the surface of the water."

For a moment Barenziah didn't reply, she simply closed her eyes and tilted
her face up toward the sun. Inhaling deeply, she sighed a little and then
opened her eyes to look at Z'lred, "Thank you for leaving with me, even if
I couldn't explain why I had to go."

"It's okay, I don't mind, though I am kind of disappointed we missed out on
the dancing." Z'lred extended his hand to her once more. "Walk with me."

Taking Z'lred's hand, Barenziah fell into step beside of him, "I'll save
you a dance at the next feast at Dolphin Cove to make up for it."

"That's too far away." Z'lred inserted a bit of whine into his voice, just
for kicks, but it was hardly sincere. As Barenziah took his hand, he began
to stroll across the field, aiming for the roll of a hill that arched in
front of them. "You know, if you ever just want to get away, you're more
than welcome to ask me."

"I know, but I wouldn't want to inconvenience you. You have already done so
much for me, a complete stranger." she squinted against the sun as she
looked up at him.

"You're not a stranger to me any more. We're friends now, so why wouldn't
I help you out, huh?" Z'lred led her over the rolling edge, then down the
gentle hill. Before them, water sparkled in the sunlight as the stream
greeted them. "And we all have problems. You need help, just ask, all
right?"

Barenziah gave Z'lred's hand a squeeze, "I will. You're too good to me,
Z'lred. Thank you." She had never expected to find such support after
leaving Amber Hills, especially from a dragonrider.

Last updated on the December 1st 2015

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What Could Have Been