A Little Bit of Happiness

Writers: Miriah, Suzee
Date Posted: 13th July 2015

Characters: Ninaine, N'call
Description: Ninaine shows N'call her new look and then gets an offer.
Location: Dragonsfall Weyr
Date: month 13, day 18 of Turn 7
Notes: Mentioned: T'lat

Ninaine

N'call

Ninaine plucked at the light leggings that T'lat had fit her in. She
had to admit that the soft material was comfortable as well as roomy
enough for her growing belly, and the tunic was long enough to be
decent. T'lat had good taste, she decided. As Luneth flew towards a
familiar ledge, she wondered what N'call would think of her newer
appearance. She'd even cut her hair. It didn't flow down to her bottom
any more, but hung just below the shoulder blades. It was still thick,
but it felt surprisingly better and far lighter.

Luneth checked to see if Haloth was inside before she landed gently on
the ledge and slipped inside of the bronze's wallow. She warbled a
greeting to the big bronze and lowered herself as flat as she could
while Ninaine awkwardly unbuckled her straps and eyed the floor.

N'call was at his workbench when Haloth told him Luneth's was on her
way in. He turned and rose with a smile. He hadn't seen her in a
couple of days. "Hello," he started. Then his eyes widened. "That's
new, You look nice!"

Ninaine stared at him for a moment from her perch on Luneth. "So I
didn't look nice before?" Her surging hormones decided to take umbrage
at the comment as she eyed him. She huffed softly; that hadn't been
the reaction she was expecting, though she was pleased that he thought
she looked nice. She undid the last strap and awkwardly swung her leg
over and floundered for just a moment, before catching herself. Luneth
went still, turning her head quickly to keep an eye on her rider.

N'call's eyes popped when she retorted, "No, I mean yes...you look
really ni...." he leaped forward to steady her when she stumbled.
"Hey," he said softly in her ear. "Be careful there sweet." He put an
arm around her to help her toward the sofa.

She leaned against him with a soft "oof" and shivered at his breath
against her ear. "Thank you. It's getting a little harder to get off
of Luneth." The complaint was a soft one, and something that T'lat had
already pointed out. "So, you really like it?" She gestured at her
clothing. "It's not a dress."

"I'm sure," he said. "Do you want some juice or water," he asked when
he finally got her to sit. "You know," he nodded as he walked toward
the table and picked up a glass. "You're going to need to move out of
your Weyr at least until after the baby is born."

Was it wrong to feel a bit annoyed that everyone was pointing that
out? "T'lat and a few others have pointed that out." Still a bit
disappointed that she hadn't wowed him, she tried to get comfortable
on the couch and still maintain some decorum in the leggings. It
certainly wasn't easy. The next subject wasn't going to make it any
easier. "I wanted to talk to you about the baby. It's kind of
important."

"And I really like the new outfit," he continued from his prior
thought before he shook his head at her obvious pique at his comment.
"We just care..." But then her last comment gave him a moments
concern. "Are you alright?"

"Thank you." That was better. She smoothed down the shirt, feeling
better about her decision to wear it for him. She then sighed. "I know
you all care. It's just not that easy. Everyone, except me, is about
to graduate and we have the new weyrlings about to get their weyrs and
it's not going to be that easy to get a new weyr and move into it. I'm
working on it."

Ninaine looked up at the change in his voice and blinked. "I'm fine. I
just..." She paused, trying to find the right words and visibly
struggled for a long moment. "I don't think I'll be a good mother,
N'call." She looked back down at her hands. "I talked to Lady Yanley.
She said she would talk to D'ale about fostering the baby." She looked
embarrassed and a little ashamed as she continued softly. "I once
thought that that was all I should do...raising a family. But now..."
She cleared her throat. "I don't think I should."

What if he was mad at her? What if he was disappointed? Her brow
furrowed as she forced herself to continue. "Luneth still needs all of
my attention, or at least most of it. We're behind because of
our...problems. It wouldn't be fair to the baby or to Luneth." She
chewed on her lower lip. "Part of me thinks I should be a mother to
the baby and that's all I should worry about." She laid her hand on
her swollen abdomen. "But I can't. I'm not ready. Luneth isn't ready."
Slowly her gaze rose to look at N'call, her expression wary of his
reaction. "I can't do both right now."

"Come here," he said and put his arm around her. "You're a dragonrider
and you can't also be a full time parent. I wouldn't expect you to be.
Neither does anyone else. That is why we have foster mothers, to give
the babies and children what they need when we know our own lives may
be short lived in a Pass." His hand rubbed up and down on her
shoulder. "You worry so much. I do have an idea for you though." He
looked down into her eyes. "What if you were to move in here for
awhile? I've got lots of room."

She leaned against him the moment his arm went around her. It spoke of
her growing comfort and trust in him, something she showed a bare few.
Since he'd first touched her, she'd began to crave human contact, but
more so, she could rely on him to make her feel soothed, warm and
protected. The stroking touch of his hand on her shoulder made her
sigh, her muscles relaxing until he made his suggestion. She went
still and her face shot upwards to stare at him with wide eyes. Move
in for a while. Her eyes searched his. He wasn't asking to weyrmate;
he just said for a while. She _had_ to remind herself of that.
But..."Move in?" Her voice was soft and her eyes searched his face.

If she was still her mother's daughter, she would have said no
immediately. A good girl didn't do that sort of thing. **A good girl
doesn't get pregnant before a wedding either.** She reminded herself.
"I'd be...sleeping with you every night?" She lifted a hand and
touched his mouth, looking at the warm lips beneath her fingers. A
good and proper young lady wouldn't even be thinking about agreeing to
that, but shards, she wanted to. She wasn't a good and proper young
lady, she decided. She never would be. She was tired of trying. Her
eyes moved back up to meet his. "We could, " She paused with a soft
little laugh, "_do_ things more often?"

He started to tell her she could sleep in the other bedroom if she
felt uncomfortable but her last words made him chuckle and squeeze her
shoulders. "Sure," he smiled. "If that's what you want."

Her head tilted to the side and her eyes warmed. "You really want me
to stay with you? After all the emotional and stupid things that I've
done?" She couldn't seem to stop touching his face, her fingers
stroking his chin, lips and jawline. The thought of waking up to him
in the morning was a pleasant one. She'd found that in Dragonfall's
weather, his warmth was a luxury that she enjoyed, especially in the
morning. "I've been rather silly, haven't I?"

Internally he agreed with her but his eyes just crinkled. "You're
young sweetheart." He didn't mean for it to be condescending but just
indicate that he understood why she was the way she was. "I do want
you to stay with me. I wouldn't have asked otherwise. And there is
plenty of room for Luneth on Haloths ledge."

"You know..." she blushed a little bit and snuggled close to his side.
"I'm tired of trying to a proper lady, N'call." She leaned her head
against her shoulder. "I'm never going to be one. Trying to be just
hurts me and Luneth. I don't know who I really am. Not yet. But I'm
going to try to find me." She lifted her head to look at his jaw.
"And..." She flushed brighter, but her voice was a little husky.
"...this pregnancy, it's making me want things." Her hand slipped to
the neckline of his shirt. "A lot." It was hard for her just to come
out and say what she wanted. She doubted she'd ever be like the
stereotypical greenrider and be blunt about that sort of thing.

He picked up the hand that had slipped into his shirt and brought her
palm to his lips, "Then you shall have them," he said. "We can go get
your stuff later."

She sighed softly at the touch of his lips, her fingers curling to
touch his cheek. He always made her feel so...nice wasn't the word.
Wanted. That was it. And she loved the way he could make her feel. He
made her feel beautiful and desirable, even when she was swollen and
starting to waddle. She was beginning to feel as though she might
actually be able to find a little bit of happiness at the Weyr.

Last updated on the July 14th 2015

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A Little Bit of Happiness