Trying To Help

Writers: Leigh M-F., Miriah
Date Posted: 11th March 2015

Characters: Ninaine, A'kua
Description: She's not well, but he's trying.
Location: Dragonsfall Weyr
Date: month 11, day 10 of Turn 7
Notes: Mentioned: Yanley, T'lat, N'call.

Ninaine

In all honesty, he probably should have waited a little longer, given
Ninaine more space, but he didn't want to. Aluka was worried for her.
Shards if he he could logically explain why, but the worry was not to
be ignored. So he borrowed a thermos, asked for some meatrolls, and
found a weyrling on elevator duty during the evening free time. Like
another time he visited, Aluka offered a bribe -in this case, two
meatrolls- and was promised a ride as the blue politely asked Luneth
if Ninaine would like a visitor.

As the blue deposited Aluka on her ledge, Luneth lifted her head and
huffed softly. The green didn't croon in greeting but the scent of the
meatrolls was enough to prick her interest. She lifted herself off of
the ledge, lowering her head expectantly. }: The meatroll person is
here. :{

The image of Aluka popped into her mind and Ninaine rolled to her
back, still on her bed. The nausea hadn't quite faded, and she really
didn't want any visitors, but the image of his expression seemed
worried. She sighed. ** You can let him in. **

}: After the meatroll. :{ Luneth kept her tail by the entrance flap,
only willing to move it out of the way after she received her
appropriate bribe.

At first, Aluka was confused by the lack of greeting from his friend,
and Luneth's posture; then he realized where her snout was pointing.
He hesitantly unwound the meatrolls and held one out to the green.
"Not sure how much you'll like it," he warned. "It's wrapped in baked
bread."

Delicately, Luneth snipped the meatroll out of Aluka's hand and with
evident relish chewed and swallowed. She smacked her lips with
satisfaction and moved her tail, allowing him access to the entrance.
She huffed over him for just a minute, whuffling at his hair before
heading back to her wallow.

The flap lifted slowly and a green tinged Ninaine appeared. "Come in, Aluka."

So dragons liked bread? Who'da thunk it? The amusing idea was pushed
aside as soon as he saw his friend. "Are ya okay?" Aluka asked
anxiously, entering the weyr before Luneth could change her mind about
his presence.

"I"m feeling a bit sick. " A bit was an understatement. She swallowed
roughly and then immediately laid back down. It wasn't only her nausea
that was dragging her down, though she might not have realized it at
that moment. She just didn't want to get out of bed. Feeling so
ashamed of herself, so low and humiliated...it was only a matter of
time before a Weyrlingmaster decided to check on why she had been so
ill the past few days and holed up in her weyr.

"Aw, no." Aluka put the thermos and meatrolls on the nearest flat
surface and went to Ninaine's side. "Do ya have a fever?" He slid off
his left glove and reached for his friend's forehead to check. "Have
ya seen a healer at all? Is there anythin' ya need? I got some ginger
tea in that thermos; I know there's somethin' medicinal about it, but
I honestly grabbed it 'cause it tastes good."

She batted with annoyance at his hand. "I don't have a fever." Ninaine
turned her head to the side to bury her head into a pillow. "Yes. I've
been to a Healer." At the mention of ginger tea so commonly used for
nausea, especially in the early stages of pregnancy, her lower lip
quivered. She curled up into a ball, tucking her knees as close as she
could against her chest. "I don't want shaffing tea."

Whoa. Something was really wrong if Ninaine was swearing again. "Then
what can I do, li'l sis?" he asked gently, trying to suppress the
rising sense of anxiety.

She rolled away, her back to him. "Nothing. You can't do anything."
Tears started leaking down her face and she hurriedly wiped at them
but could hide the sniffs. "It's all my fault and all my problem."

"That doesn' mean ya should deal with it alone." Aluka carefully sat
on the bed as so not to jar his friend, put his glove back on and
rested the hand on Ninaine's shoulder. "Please, tell me what's wrong.
There has to be some way I can help."

"You can't help!" She swallowed, felt her stomach roil and then dove
off of the bed, grabbing for the bucket. Heaving miserably, she waited
until episode faded and wiped her mouth on a spare piece of cloth that
hung nearby. Blindly, she reached, found her cup of water and rinsed
her mouth before hanging her head over the bucket.

}: Her egg makes her sick. :{ Luneth supplied softly. The green's head
was thrust through the entrance of the weyr watching her rider with
concern.

"Luneth! Shut up!" Ninaine lifted her head to glare at her green,
uncaring for the moment that Luneth had actually spoken to Aluka, only
that she had mentioned what Ninaine was trying to hide. The green's
head quickly withdrew, a strong exhalation of displeasure making the
flap of leather slap against the stone.

Aluka went cold for three reasons. The first one was surprise from
being spoken to by Luneth. The second was Ninaine really had found
someone she could trust to be her first man, and that man had gotten
her with child. No wonder she was so distressed, being without a
weyrmate and unable to mentally leave her Hold. Was that why she had
asked him about what he would do if someone wanted to weyrmate with
him?

The third was it was like seeing his hung-over mother all over again.
Moving mechanically, completely on autopilot, he got up, took off his
glove again, and rested his hand on the wall until his skin took a
slight chill, then came up behind Ninaine and lightly placed his bare
hand on her forehead in an attempt to be soothing. With his other
hand, he gathered her long hair at the back of her neck and held it
just as lightly, just in case the greenrider felt sick another time.

Miserable, Ninaine peered up at Aluka when he touched her, dark
shadows under her eyes. "You can't tell anyone, Aluka. Promise me you
won't tell anyone. Only T'lat, a healer and I know. Please." She bit
her lower lip, eyes pleading with him.

It took a moment to realize he was being spoken to. The internal
coldness retreated slightly, and the memories abated temporarily.
"What about the father? What do ya want him to do?" he asked,
realizing his friend hadn't said a word to the man.

Ninaine shrank back a little pushing the bucket aside and taking a
little sip of water. She stared at the cup for a long moment. "I
haven't told N'call." She wiped at her eyes. "I don't want him to
know. He..I...I'm pregnant and I wasn't careful and I know it's
supposed to be okay here, but it's not to me and we're not weyrmated
and it doesn't matter because he's too busy with Teseada and the
stupid eggs when they come and ..." Her composure was completely gone,
leaving nothing but raw emotion behind. "..and maybe he doesn't want
the baby, not that it matters because he's a shaffing brozerider and
they have babies everywhere!"

So his name was N'call, bronzerider. Aluka digested this and moved his
hands. The one he had cooled was probably too warm for comfort now,
anyway, and it seemed Ninaine's guts had settled for the time being.
Then, he asked what was probably the most important question. "Do ya
want it?" And was it too late if she didn't?

She wiped at her eyes and peered blearily up at him. "What do you
mean, do I want it?" She sniffed and took another drink of water. "It
doesn't matter if I want it or not." She blinked and her eyes
narrowed. "And I'm not going to kill it. I know what the phrase 'a
short trip /between/' means. I don't think that's right and I'm not
going to do it, so it doesn't matter what I want."

"What ya want always matters, to me if not to ya," Aluka told her, but
left it at that. He should have known that would be the answer,
really. "Look, I- I can't be your weyrmate, like ya were askin' about
at the lake, but if ya need me at any time, or if your child needs an
honorary uncle, then tell me what I can do, and I'll do it. You're
still my friend, Ninaine. I want to help."

She nodded slowly. "Thank you." She took another drink. "I guess I can
forget about visiting with my father again. He wouldn't be able to
forgive this." She took a shuddering breath. "I know this happens here
all the time, I just didn't think it would happen to me." She stared
at her cup. "I don't know what to do. I'm just...angry at myself. And
I feel stupid."

"Don'," Aluka requested. "This isn' your fault. No one told ya
there're precautions that can be taken." Not that he was an expert,
but having had a lover in his hold who occasionally talked about such
things, and having lived in the Weyr, he knew there were herbs that
could prevent pregnancy. They weren't a hundred percent effective, of
course, but they were better than nothing. But Ninaine's parents had
raised her to be a holder wife, and holder wives had children, even
against their wishes. So of course her worthless mother never would
have said anything about it- if she even knew herself. "Are ya sure ya
don' want me to talk to anyone for ya? Lady Yanley, maybe?"

"We're supposed to drink a tea to...to keep it from happening. I just
didn't think about it." She admitted. "I never really thought about it
and I should have. They did tell us." Ninaine swirled the water in her
cup before finishing it, then raised her head in surprise. "Lady
Yanley? No! She'd be so ashamed of me! I..." She shook her head. "I'd
be too ashamed to talk to her."

"Okay, I won' talk to her," Aluka said, even as he doubted Yanley
could ever be ashamed of her protege. "If it helps, just remember that
dragonriders don' raise their children. But in the meantime, like I
said, I'm here. I'll even help bathe Luneth when you're further along,
if she'll allow it."

"How is that supposed to help?" Ninaine rubbed at her eyes. "I was
taught how to do _that_." She took a slow breath. "Thank you. I'll
probably need it, I guess. There's no way I can crawl up on her if I'm
as big as a runner."

The Candidate touched Ninaine's cheek. "I'm sorry this got sprung on
ya, li'l sis," he said quietly. "But I promise I'll do my best, if
that's worth anythin'."

"If I'd never done anything, this wouldn't have happened." She wiped
at her eyes. While she didn't regret it while it was happening, the
situation now made her actions look foolish. "But thank you." She
looked up and suddenly wrapped her arms around his shoulders.

Aluka bent slightly to allow this and hugged Ninaine in turn, still
feeling cold. Why did bad things keep happening to the women in his
life? And why wasn't there an easier way to make everything better?

Last updated on the March 17th 2015

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Trying To Help