Are You Alright?

Writers: Devin, Miriah
Date Posted: 4th February 2014

Characters: J'kri, Paetri
Description: J'kri and Paetri comfort each other a bit after the /between/ing acciden
Location: Dragonsfall Weyr
Date: month 4, day 25 of Turn 7
Notes: Follows "Believe"

As soon as the class was dismissed, J'kri rushed over to his friend.
"Are you okay? Shards, you scared me." He gripped her shoulders, as if
proving to himself she was still there.

Paetri gave a shaky breath and laid her hands on J'kri's. Her fingers
trembled only a little, but she nodded. "I'm okay." She shook her head
slowly. "I messed it all up, J'kri. It wasn't Camilth. It was me."

"What happened?"

She bent to rest her forehead on his shoulder and took a deep breath,
her fingers tightening on his for a moment. "I thought of my parents
right before we /betweened/. I guess Camilth took the image of my old
home and used it instead of the Star Stones. It was a stupid, stupid
mistake. I could have killed both of us."

"You didn't _mean_ for her to go there. I've heard some weyrlings try
that as a stunt, but it was just an accident."J'kri wrapped her in a
hug. "You're both safe." He didn't think he'd ever been so scared in
his life when they didn't appear above the Star Stones like the others
had.

Shivering, she burrowed her face into his neck. It hit her then,
really hit her, what the cost of her mistake could have been. She
would have lost Camilth and herself, but all of the weyrlings would
have had to deal with the suddeness of it. J'kri, her friend, would
have had to listen to Rademerth keen for her and Camilth. All as a
result of her not paying enough attention, because she let her worries
and anxiety control her.

Her voice came out as a whisper against his neck. " I'm sorry you had
to see that."

"I'm sorry you went through it."

She gave another shuddering sigh and nestled close. Though J'darin had
given her some measure of comfort, J'kri's arms felt warm and gave her
a reassurance that the Weyrlingmaster simply couldn't. It was silly,
and she knew that they must look ridiculous just standing there, but
she wanted to stay in that warmth. "I'll do better next time."

"Of course you will. You made a mistake, but you did go /between/.
You've got some practice, more than the rest of us who haven't had a
turn yet." J'kri had still been waiting to be called when Paetri had
her accident. Until then, he'd had his hands full keeping Rademerth
calm.

She grimaced against his chest. "We'll all try again tomorrow.
Rademerth will do excellently and so will Camilth. No mistakes next
time."

He pulled back enough so he could look at her. "We'll do perfectly.
And then we'll celebrate." His smile showed what kind of celebration
he had in mind.

Her eyes widened at the import and she swallowed, a frisson of both fear
and a fluttering of anticipation coiling in her. She swallowed and took
a step back. "I'm not ready...not for that."

"Well, we can start slow. Don't worry." He took her hand and squeezed
it. Then he laughed. "This will all be so much easier without having
to sneak off to a storage room." Spending private time with his fellow
Candidates had been tricky. With a weyr of his own, he'd always have a
place to go.

Starting slow? She looked down at their hands and returned the
squeeze. She cared for J'kri; he was her dearest friend. The thought
that he would have to hurt her chilled whatever warmth those words may
have tried to start. She didn't want him to be the one to hurt her.
She didn't want to have to look at him and remember him hurting her in
that intimate way. She wanted to keep the warmth that was between
them. "I'm sure it will be." Her voice was soft, her brow furrowed as
she released his hand. "Look...Harki told me things...you
know...Cerillith's rider? Well...she told me that it was my choice and
all after she explained how it was. And that I really didn't have to.
So... you don't have to worry about it, J'kri."

His face fell. "Worry? Oh, I... I thought you liked me." Had he been
wrong? Or had she changed her mind? "It's okay, though. If you want
someone else, if you just want to be friends, that's fine. And if you
don't have anyone in mind yet, I could help you find someone."

Paetri floundered, her mouth opening and closing as she stared at him.
She hadn't meant to hurt J'kri's feelings. "Oh, no...J'kri, that's not
what I meant at all! I do like you...more than anyone else here at
the weyr. You mean...you mean a lot to me. " She suddenly reached
forward and hugged him tightly. " I don't want to do it at all, J'kri.
Even Harki said it would hurt me. I don't want you to be the one
hurting me."

He frowned thoughtfully. "Well, if you do it right, it only hurts a
little, and only for a moment. At least, that's what the people I
asked said. I know it's not quite the same, but when it happened to me
it wasn't bad. It felt so good after the bit of pain that I didn't
care." After tomorrow, he'd be able to enjoy it again. J'kri could
hardly wait.

She fell quiet, but kept her arms around him as she listened. "It hurt
for you too? And then it got better?"

He opened his mouth to answer, then took a deep breath. "Let's have
this conversation tomorrow, after we're officially senior weyrlings."

Nodding slowly, she finally let him got and took a step back. "Okay. I
can do that. Just...be patient with me for now, okay? Give me some
time?"

"Of course." He took her hand and squeezed it. "I don't want to rush you."

Last updated on the March 15th 2014

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Are You Alright?