Simple

Writers: Clancey
Date Posted: 16th March 2013

Characters: J'darin
Description: J'darin finally understands.
Location: Dragonsfall Weyr
Date: month 12, day 12 of Turn 6
Notes: Mentioned: Devyn, Traelyn, Maurgen, Kalina, Cardella and G'wen (not by name)

J'darin

Cold, snowy evenings made for lots of thinking. He was trapped in his
weyr with his interfering bronze dragon. But, for once, he was alone.

Things had been somewhat busy for the Weyrlingmaster of late, and he had
not spent nearly as much time with Devyn as he would have liked, and that
meant that she was _not_ here tonight, when most nights a few months past,
they would have been together.

The odd thing about it was that while he missed her fiercely, and was
considering asking her over, he found that for the first time in a long
while, he was able to be _alone_ with his thoughts.

Without drinking, sadness, or self-pity.

Amazing, that.

He considered the last several months, while carving a trinket for Devyn on
his sofa.

Its odd that most of the changes had begun when he'd met Devyn. Well, he
thought it was odd. Coming home to Dragonsfall had indeed been a good
choice for he and Hasaarth, despite the troubles when he first realized he
was in charge of Weyrlings again.

Such responsibility.... A soft sigh escaped and his fingers stopped carving
for a moment. He had fallen for one, one had died, and he had nearly
killed another one. Oh yes, he was a fantastic Weyrlingmaster. A snort
escaped as he examined that thought from all sides for a moment. Yes,
there had been trouble. Yes, there had been horrible days. But.... his
gaze lingered on Hasaarth a moment .... while there was Thread, there would
always be horrible days.

His dragon appeared to be feigning sleep, but he felt a vague stirring in
his mind that showed Hasaarth was not as asleep as he seemed. }:It is
well.:{

That was it, of course. Its not like his dragon completely understood all
the intricacies of human behavior, even his own rider. He was simple
enough, and his emotions were simple, with clear motivation. That was an
interesting thought.

He paused again to consider motivation.

Simple motivation. He had met Devyn and found her fascination. Simple.
He had been drinking so much it was making him sick, so he stopped.
Simple. He had liked Devyn and continued to see her. Simple. He
knew that he and Hasaarth were doing the only job they had - preparing
young riders to fight Thread - to the best of their ability. Simple. He
had driven away most of the people in his life who might have been friends
because he was stupid. Simple.

"Huh." He said aloud. "Is it really that simple? Motivation, result?"

Oak appeared over his head chittering, bearing a note strapped to his leg.
He was asking for his treat as he landed on the arm of J'darin's soft.
Simple. Deliver the message, get a treat. Simple.

He pulled the note free and read it; it was from his sister Jarie. It
appeared that she and his mother had decided.... they were going to move to
the Weyr after all, so they could be with him.

Simple, right?

For a moment, he thought he had it all figured out. For a moment, he
thought he had grown up, at last.

But then he remembered...

Simple may be at the heart of life, but it was the complexities of human
interaction that were what made life interesting. And not Simple. But
that was alright... simple motivation could drive complex behavior.

Really, if he paused to think about the complexity that was his sister, he
should have known all along. Stunningly gorgeous, yet never married.
Too busy. Perhaps she would settle down with a rider, here at the Weyr.

He remembered Traelyn, too, and smiled. Now _she_ had been complex.
Their relationship had undergone so many changes he had stopped trying to
understand them. And before her, Kalina. She was even more of a tangle
than Trae had been.

Yet by contrast, Maurgen had been fairly simple. At least in her devotion
to him.

And Devyn.... he could not classify her either way.

One thing he did know, and that was simple: His life had been far better
since she came into it, and it was time he acted like it.

He put down the carving he was making for her, and once again thought about
his life. He rose to his feet and went to lean on Hasaarth, thinking of
the cold winter outside. There was no condemnation, no self-pity, not
unshakeable sadness in him at that moment, and he forced himself to look.

Deep blue eyes fastened on the scar on his right arm, showing up starkly
against his skin. Those same eyes followed that scar, down his right leg,
and over to the bronze hide of his dragon, which showed a matching scar.
They stood out, those scars. But for the first time, he found himself
following the lines and curves of the scars and realizing it for it was...
a scar. Simple.

So what if he had one? or two? or six? Scars meant one thing: He had
done something to get them. And in this case, he had saved a Weyrling and
lost the Weyrleadership all in one simple scar.

It was, in its own way, a reminder that life for dragonriders was both very
simple now that Thread was falling - it could end at any moment - and very
complex. Everything they did was for someone _else_. They loved, they
lived, they laughed, they died, and they risked all of those things for
someone _else_. Simple Motivation - motivation to save, to protect, and
to stay alive so they could continue to save and protect. Before Thread,
that had been different, though riders still lived for their dragons. But
now, with Thread falling, it was much more simple. The old Harper tune
said it, really. Dragonriders must fly/when Thread is in the sky.

Simple.

**It is well, indeed.** He finally answered his dragon, and returned to his
carving.

Maybe he was finally growing up.

Last updated on the April 1st 2013

Welcome to Triad Weyrs!

Simple