Saying Things You'll Regret

Writers: Avery, Heather
Date Posted: 24th February 2020

Characters: D'kere, Talwynn
Description: D'kere and Talwynn have an unsuccessful attempt at talking after their argument over Yasmene's request.
Location: Dragonsfall Weyr
Date: month 2, day 11 of Turn 10
Notes: Mentioned: Teseada
Notes: Follows "You're My Safety (2)"

D'kere had expected Talwynn to come back to their weyr that evening,
perhaps after she had cooled off some. She usually became fiery-tempered
whenever Riveth was near her time to rise, but this explosive behavior
had taken the cake.

The bronzerider did not think he was faultless in what had taken place,
but the jabs that Talwynn had taken at him felt like barbs that she had
been thinking about or stewing on prior to their argument. Regardless,
when Talwynn did not come home that night, Xmrenth had reached out to
find that Riveth was in Dragonsfall.

D'kere figured she might be with one of her wingmates or perhaps her
brother, T'leri, but it amazed him all the same. They had not spent a
night apart since she had agreed to be his weyrmate, since they had
looked for a weyr together that they could enjoy as a couple. It alarmed
him to think that this misstep was somehow so grievous that the
greenrider did not even try to come home and reconcile.

A part of the bronzerider felt a little panicky, as if he should perhaps
go find her that very evening and try to reconcile before things got
worse, but then there was the other side, a side that was a bit more
prideful. Why should he be the one to make the first move? He hadn't
been the one to act like a child and storm out during what he had hoped
would be a civil conversation.

Besides, Talwynn probably needed the night to cool off, sleep on it, and
think reasonably the next day, D'kere decided. And so he did not go
after her that evening, but decided he would seek her out first thing
the next morning.

Talwynn had been furious enough she needed to leave the Weyr completely,
so she'd gone /between/ to go buy some good booze from the Vintner Hall,
and then bring it back to T'leri's weyr to drink and complain and drink
some more. She spent the night there because of a bitter headache from
the drinking and her own stubborn pride of not wanting to make the first
move when D'kere had hurt her.

In the morning, though, she had to leave. Talwynn had drills. And T'leri
had his own classes...ironically with D'kere, of course. She made her
way to the dining hall, aiming to have a quick breakfast and get this
sorted out before she had to go to her drills later.

A familiar figure stepped in front of her.

"Tal," D'kere was just relieved to see her, and she didn't look too
worse for wear.

The headache from drinking, mixed with Riveth's proddiness, mixed with
her irritation at him, combined to have her squint her eyes and bite out
a sharp, "Morning."

That didn't sound promising. "I know you have drills," he knew her
schedule like that back of his hand, "and I have class. Can we talk after?"

She supposed she should. They were weyrmates. She had to go home
eventually. But she was still on edge, so what slipped out was, "Will
you have time for me, then?"

D'kere avoided the dig, even though it made him grit his back molars
together. "Of course."

"Where do you want to talk?"

"At home?" he suggested hopefully.

"Not over lunch here?" she asked, gesturing at the dining hall.

"Lunch is fine. Whatever you want." D'kere said, although he had
suggested their weyr because he worried about Talwynn's ability to keep
her temper in check after the way she'd behaved the day before.

She wasn't sure she wanted to be alone with him right now. "Right. I'll
see you then."

--

Well, class had been interesting, to say the least, with Talwynn's
brother, T'leri, glaring daggers at him the entire time. D'kere still
wasn't sure how he had become the bad guy in this situation. It wasn't
as if he had cheated on Talwynn, or had any interest in doing so, he had
thought they could have an open conversation about something that many
people in the Weyr didn't bat an eye at. All he knew was that clearly
from Talwynn's side he was completely at fault.

He reached the Dining Cavern first but his stomach was tied in knots and
the thought of lunch held no interest. D'kere settled for a cup of klah
and took a seat to wait for the greenrider.

Talwynn arrived and saw D'kere, but she decided to go through the line
and get juice and a plate of meat and grains. She headed over to the
table and put it down and nodded at him. "D'kere. How were classes for
you and Kenirath?"

"They were fine," he said, decidedly not mentioning T'leri. "How were
drills?"

She shrugged. "Fine. It's weird right now without Tes."

Dragonsfall's goldriders seemed to be in a constant rotation of pregnant
or clutching, so the continuous instability of Sienna Wing was something
that never ceased to amaze D'kere. "I imagine so." He tried to read her
emotions but she was in one of her prickly moods, not something he was
wholly unfamiliar with, since she was often prickly when Riveth was
proddy, and so he could not figure out what was truly going on behind
the mask she wore.

"So," he said, figuring they might as well get into the thick of it.
"About yesterday...." He left it open, hoping she would fill in why she
had exploded.

"What about it?" she asked, carefully sawing meat into smaller pieces
with knife and fork.

D'kere's eyes glanced at the knife in her hand. "Well, I apologize that
things got out of hand."

She hadn't expected that, she'd thought he'd double down on thinking
he was right. "You apologize?" she said, eyebrow raising.

"Yes, I clearly went about things the wrong way." D'kere said.

"You should have told her no immediately. I'm your weyrmate, D'kere, how
would you feel if _I_ offered to sleep with some sad holdbred boy or
something?"

"I would hate it," he said immediately. "You're right. I should have
told her no upfront, but I wasn't offering to sleep with her, it wasn't
like that."

"The whole point of being weyrmates is being exclusive, right? Outside
of flights? And this isn't a flight situation, it's a choice you're
making. Or were thinking about making. But I'm supposed to be your
choice, the one you want outside of others." She scowled and stabbed her
fork a little too hard into the meat.

D'kere wanted to reach across the table to take one of her hands, but he
was afraid his hand might receive the same treatment as the meat. "You
are my choice, Tal."

This was probably the part where she should apologize for insinuating
D'kere only liked weak, pretty, fragile things. But she was still proddy
and relentless, so she said, "Well I'm glad you remembered that _now_."

**Just take a deep breath, D'kere. You know how she is when it's close
to rising time.** The bronzerider coached himself as he tried to
suppress the flash of annoyance.

"Is there anything that you would like to apologize for?" he asked.

Her response was to look at him, completely surprised. Why would she
need to apologize? For what? She'd been the hurt one! She'd been chased
out by his unfairness! She paused and settled on, "I should have told
you I was staying with T'leri."

D'kere stared at her, blinking slowly. _That_ was what she was
apologizing for? "Not the part where you told me I only look for weak
women to sleep with?"

"When we met, D'kere, I was still broken. Retired. Wounded. Are you
saying that wasn't appealing, that you, the bronzerider, could build me
up and get me to tough it out? And here's this girl now, holdbred you
said, needs to get experience you said, being all fragile and broken and
'I need my hero my bronzerider my teacher to deflower me'? How's that
not fragility?"

She stood up and slammed the knife and fork down on the table. "It makes
me wonder and I don't like it."

D'kere mirrored her, slamming his hands down on the table as he stood.
"Talwynn!" The bronzerider was not the angry type, in fact, he could
only think of a few times in his life when he had been truly angry. This
was one of those times. His blue eyes were simmering pools, his lips a
taut line. "That's enough." Blood pounded in his ears. "I have never
treated you like you were broken. Not ever. I came to you and tried to
have a conversation but you make it shardin' impossible! I don't know
where in your mind I became this big bad bronzerider who preys on
'fragile' women but if that's what you truly think of me, then this," he
gestured between them, "isn't going to work."

"What am I supposed to think, D'kere? You've never shown an interest in
anyone not me before she comes to you and bats her big eyes of whatever
and makes you feel strong, so - "

The bronzerider slashed his hand through the air to cut her off. "Don't.
I can't talk to you anymore right now or I might say something I
regret... Which clearly is not a concept that bothers you. You should
probably stay at T'leri's again tonight." D'kere walked away, tired of
the looks that they were drawing and tired of trying to reason with
Talwynn when she was unreasonable.

"Fine, I _will_," she snarled, walking away herself.

Last updated on the May 31st 2020

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Saying Things You'll Regret